Remember when Islamic women in the U.S. wanted their drivers license pictures taken with their burkas covering their faces?  Brainy.  But maybe they can tell the difference.  I can't.  So, for security reasons, Belgium wants to ban burkas in public.  It's a good move.  I mean, you can hide things in there.  I hide my 2-gallon daily liquor ration, six bags of beef jerky, a bushel of pork skins and a Norwegian ice skater.  Actually, she's hiding from my pool boy Sven.  He can be so bothersome at times.  But, I do what I can.

In 1775, the 1st Continental Congress called for a National Day of Prayer.  In 2010, U.S. District Judge Barbara B. Crabb ruled it unconstitutional.  But, what did we expect?  She's an old Crabb.

Folks are really in an uproar over Arizona's new immigration policy but I think they did it to make a point.  They and other border states have been begging for help for decades without getting it.  Think they've got everybody's attention now?  Besides, similar laws are already in force.  They're just not enforced.  For example, if we get pulled over by the police, what do they ask us for?  They want our dirvers license and insurance or...our papers, as it were.  If showing my identification to the police helps curb the influx of illegals, drugs, gangs or weapons in the slightest then, "Ask away, Skippy!"  I aim to please.  And Mexican citizens have been asked for their papers for decades anyway.  We were rolling a joint at the time but hey, papers are papers.

Actually, I kid.  I've never touched the stuff (Wow!  I can't feel my legs again).  But, protesters are out in force.  It's the first time in 150 years that people have marched in favor of slave labor.

Well, we had the shoe bomber.  Then we had the diaper bomber and now we have the "missed it by this much" bomber in New York.  It must have been embarrassing enough when the thing failed to detonate but then, he's on a plane about to leave the country when they nab him.

"Missed it by this much." 

But, at least he had the good sense to use a Nissan.  If it had been a Toyota, the whole package would have been in Saskatchewan by now.  I'm just hoping our new security policy isn't, "Hope the next bomb fails too".

As the event was unfolding, Mayor Bloomberg said he'd bet 25-cents that the culprit was a domestic terrorist, unhappy about health care (a.k.a. - a Tea Party member).  And then they arrested an Islamic man.  I'm shocked!  Shocked, I tell you!

Bloomie then left the entire subject of bombs and potentially dead New Yorkers by stating that New York would not stand for any backlash against Pakistani citizens by (who else) bigoted Americans.  One jounalist even said she was hoping the bomber wasn't a Muslim because that would lead to bigotry by (who else) evil Americans.  She was actually hoping the terrorist loon was of the home grown variety (preferably a Tea Party member).

Here's a heads-up for you tinkle-britches.  Tea Partiers don't plant bombs.  They sit in lawn chairs and play with the grandkids.

Well, I have to go now.  The hobo I buried in the back yard is getting out again.  He's such a playful scamp.

I spoke to my psychiatrist, Dr. Demonic, about these ideas.  He told me I am the oyster of intelligent thought, the corn flakes of gourmet dining and the Yugo of luxury driving.  So, I stole his birth certificate and called immigration.  He's somewhere in Argentina now.  I'm taking care of his cat, Fleabiscuit, while he's gone.  I figured it was the least I could do.

And as my mother used to say, "Something's seriously wrong with that boy".  Well, that's what she told the female Taiwanese kick boxer I had locked in the barn.

I don't get it.