Allow me to be the first to call into question everything that follows. I don’t want to go into too much detail about how this all began because it’s boring. I save the boring material for my books. (Kidding: I save it for confession. Kidding: I’m not Catholic, I’m educated. Kidding: I flubbed my way through school. No joke.)
Here’s the essential bit: One night a few years back, probably the beginning of 2001, I felt an explosion in my nasal cavity, right at the top of the bridge of my nose. It reverberated throughout my skull. I felt and heard the thing and there’s no other description than an explosion. Just a cracking noise and then BANG! Like a powder keg. It didn’t hurt but felt like it should hurt in the same way one feels the surgeon’s knife cutting one’s anesthetized flesh. It was a numb, dull near-pain. It was too quick and shocking to be scary. It felt like something I should have died from. Maybe I did.
I want to tell you that I was flooded with visions but I don’t remember if that happened or not. I just know I want to tell you it did. But it might not have. Not then, anyway. However, something did open in me and I’ve been having visions ever since. It’s hard to say “ever since,” though, because I can’t say for certain that this and the subsequent visions are related—but wouldn’t that tie things together neatly?
I began meditating for the first time just prior to the explosion so one could draw the conclusion that meditating was the catalyst. Oh, and by visions I mean…well…I’ll tell you some other time. Anyway, cut to months later. By now things have evolved. I’m not just having visions, I am…um… asking myself questions and my right hand is responding. Not like in The Shining, so you can skip those jokes.
I don’t remember how I discovered this worked but it did. And before you call me a freak and click through this page, let me feel a little saner by telling you that there is an old policemen’s trick of having a suspect dangle a pocket watch. The officer would ask yes or no questions. If the watch spun clockwise, that meant YES. Counterclockwise meant NO. No movement meant DON’T KNOW. In this way did they gain access to the subconscious mind of the suspect.
At first, I had all of my fingers curl into my palm for YES and stay still for NO. I later modified it by only using my index finger on my right hand and having it curl in for YES, bend backwards for NO and stay still for NO RESPONSE. I only ever told one person about this because it’s embarrassing to talk about something so odd. She liked the idea and began asking me questions over the phone that applied to her life. All of the answers were true or came true . I even asked when one of my roommates was coming home and it got the answer right. Does this prove anything? Nope. But there it is.
I stopped doing this because I didn’t want to end on a fascination. I wanted to remain open to everything and so refused to get bogged down in visions, psychic phenomena and the like. I wanted to go beyond thought, beyond the collective mind. When I say “wanted,” I don’t mean I strove for anything because I wouldn’t know what to strive for. The word “strive” implies that you know what you are endeavoring for and so the end result will be self-fulfilled. I’m through with self-fulfillment. Understanding is the only key to everything. The meanings of “understanding” and “everything” are another discussion for another time. And don’t even get me started on “time.” For now, here’s this….
11/18/01
Early Morning
Asked meditation energy to answer the following by curling my fingers into my palm for YES and remaining flat for NO.
Are there aliens? – YES
Have I been abducted by them? – YES
Has my sister? [I asked this twice] – NO
Mother? – YES
Father? – YES [weakly]
Do I continue to be? – YES
Did they abduct my mother before I was born? – NO
After? – YES
Did they start abducting me in my youth? – NO
Birth? – NO
Did I know them before birth? – YES
Will I after I die? – NO
Are they good aliens? – YES
Are there bad aliens? – YES
Have I been abducted by them? – NO
Has Whitley Strieber [author/abductee] been abducted by the same aliens as I? – YES [cautiously]
Are they from another planet? – NO
Are they from another dimension? – NO
Are they from earth? – YES
Will the world end as we know it by 2012? – NO
Will I die? [not by 2012, in general] – YES
Will I go with the aliens in death? – NO
Will I be with God? – NO
Will I roam the earth? – NO
Will I still be me, some semblance of myself? – YES
Was Jesus the Son of God as the Bible claims? – NO
Was Krishnamurti [Jiddu Krishnamurti] dead-on correct in his teachings? – YES
Do these aliens have a grand-scale plan we don’t know about? – YES
Can we know about it? – NO
Is it good? – YES
Would I agree with it if I knew? – YES
Are they mixing hybrids in with the population? – YES
Is it part of a takeover of earth? – NO
Will I always have the same women problems? – NO
Should I go to bed now? – NO [it is past 6:00am]
Should I write this down? – YES
Can I always come to you for answers? – YES
Are you always the gospel truth? – YES [trepid]
Take out the word gospel. Do you always tell the truth? – YES [emphatic]
Should I fear the aliens abducting me? – NO
Do I? – YES
Will they abduct me in 2 hours? – NO
Will they abduct me tonight? – NO
Will they abduct me again in the future? – YES
Do I lead a double life with these aliens? – YES
Will the world as we know it change in my lifetime? – YES
Will the change be a horrendous disaster? – NO
Will it be a natural disaster? – NO
Will it be the decimation of humanity? – NO
Will it be an alien takeover? – NO
Can I ask you more questions? – NO
Are you still there? – YES
Can I ask you one more question? – YES
Then I should go to sleep, yeah? – YES
It’s a two-part question: Ultimately, will this change be good for humanity? – YES
Initially, will it seem catastrophic to us? – NO
At that, I went to sleep.
###
12/04/01 – 2:30pm
I had recently finished reading The Sirius Mystery by Robert Temple. The book postulates that earth had been visited in antiquity by amphibious beings from Sirius. If true , I wanted to know if they are the same beings abductees claim to interact with today. (If not the so-called “Grays,” then the so-called “Reptilians,” perhaps?) Having nowhere else to turn, I turned inward and asked my hand. If that part sounds insane, you must have missed the bit where multiple races of alien beings are visiting earth and abducting people. That part you’ll entertain but not me gaining a response from my hand? Grow up.
Did aliens from Sirius leave us clues to discover them but then meet an unforeseen fate wherein they needed to return to earth for our genetic stock to create hybrids and keep their species alive? – NO
Did an alien race visit earth from Sirius like in that book [The Sirius Mystery]? – YES
Are they abducting people? – NO
Is another group of beings abducting humans? – YES
Are they working together [the two non-human groups]? – NO
Do they know about each other? – YES
Do either mean us harm? – NO
Is there such a thing as earth cycles? – NO RESPONSE
Earth cycles…wherein ice ages occur? – YES
Is there another Ice Age coming? – YES
Soon? – YES
In the next decade? – YES
Will that wipe out a significant proportion of humanity? – YES
Is this bad? – NO
Is this a natural disaster? – NO
Is it good? – NO
Is there such a thing as natural disaster? – NO
It just happens; it’s just nature. Disaster is human invention. – YES
Is there such a thing as evil? – YES
Is there such a thing as good? – STRONG YES
Does evil understand this? – YES
Does evil work in concert with good? – YES
Evil is part of the good? – YES
After this next Ice Age will hybrids [human/them] be living here? – YES
They will take over? – NO
Will they be living with humans? – YES
Will we ever meet the aliens on equal footing? – STRONG YES
Is there a hierarchy of beings in the universe? – YES
Are the Nordic Blonde types at the top for the food chain? – NO RESPONSE [Nordic Blondes are a human-looking race of beings who pop up again and again in abductee literature. They would be Hitler’s wet dream except they seem to be compassionate. When witnessed working in conjunction with the Grays, the Blondes appear to be in a position of authority over them.]
Do these Blondes exist? – YES
Are they at the top of the hierarchy? – NO
Is God? – NO RESPONSE
Is The One? – STRONG YES [Abductee literature is peppered with stories of an entity or Source commonly called “The One.” It’s unclear who or what this energy being is but it sounds like what some would say is meant by the word “God.” For more on The One, check out The Watchers, by Raymond Fowler. Do NOT check out Star Trek V]
Is The One God? – YES
###
So there ya go, folks. Make of this what you will. The only reason I am sharing this with you is that so many very real, extremely strange things are happening with me right now that I cannot just discount this as the load of crap it looks like. All I can tell you with absolute certainty is that life is rich and the very atmosphere around us is teeming with it. I don’t believe I am special in any way and I don’t believe I have a mission in life. Having a mission is part of the game we play, but it isn’t real. I am going to show you what is real. I am going to do this because I can and if ever a sin exists, it’s not sharing this “knowledge.”
Our entire lives are a lie. There is truth absolute, but it can never be institutionalized, for the very uttering of it kills it, turns it into dictatorships and hierarchies and all that mess. Belief systems of ALL kinds—including anti-systems, including governments, including religions, including philosophy, including scientific materialism, including these dead words—are never ever EVER the answer. The answer is as alive as the human body. The answer IS the human body.
We are the skeleton key to all worlds. Soon, I will show you how to turn it.
