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  Home > Holidays > Articles Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry      Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

By George xx xx

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Money was all over the place.

I was going Christmas Shopping and had to make a left turn from Rainbow onto Charleston. I was in the right left turn lane, (Peoples from small towns won’t understand that.)
In the left left turn lane was an armored car, (small town peoples try to follow.)
The light turned green and we tromped on the execrator, (as we normally do in this town.)
What the hell is an execrator? That’s what Spellchecker put in when I tried to spell accelerator. It just did it again, but I deleted it, and I looked it up in a Funkin Wagnall. Boy did I have that word wrong.
As we flew around the bend, centrifugal force, (Learned about that in science on one of the days I was in school. Didn’t learn how to spell it though? Go Spellchecker!)
Anyway centrifugal force caused a side door on the armored car to fly open and a box of money flew out and burst open right before my very eyes. I thought I’d died and gone to heaven.
Instinctively I froze at the wheel. Fortunately, my momentum, (another word I learned in science, also with the aide of Spellchecker. I really thought I knew that one?) carried me through the scene.
The box contained money rolls and coins were all over the place.
I didn’t want to get involved so I didn’t get involved.
When I got to the mall I checked my tires for coins but apparently they only pick up nails, glass, and rocks.
I asked if they had any big magnets but they looked at me like I was crazy. I asked Santa to bring me one for Christmas. Next time I’ll be ready!
Bye George


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Reviewed on December 10, 2016
Serious fun to read! I am glad that you did spend a day in school here and there, it really helped the story (and the spellchecker was glad to have something to do). Your ideas and your style are great, love it. Hope you get that magnet for Christmas!
Birgit

Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on December 1, 2016
Very funny. I thought sure that you would be caught in a flurry of flying bills and have to stop to get them off your windshield. And, I certainly enjoyed the foibles of spellcheckers. And, you made me remember being in a spelling bee and having to spell conscience. I used a little trick, spelling con and then following it with science. But of course, in order to have that trick work I had to know how to spell science and remembered that it was "i before e, except after c."

I am very seriously thinking of going to a local low-budget grocery store and handing out my books free with $50 bills as bookmarks. I originally thought I could do it with $100 bills, but, with $1000 investment I could make 20 poor families very happy rather than 10. And, all the selfies they would take and spread on the Internet, going viral of a wheelchair secret Santa would give me more publicity for my books than I would ever get any other way.

Thanks for reminding me!

Ron

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