The dinner hour and evening seem to be the most difficult times of the day for people who live alone. Your errands have been run, the work day is done, and its getting dark outside. Eating alone seems depressing and deciding what to do afterwards becomes a chore, or aggravation.

How to ease that transition time from late afternoon to dinner takes some planning. People who have (almost) mastered this start with a list on Sunday evening that takes them through the week. Connecting with people doesn't all have to be done during the day or the weekend. If you're working, consider having a few business meetings around dinnertime or shortly after. Others may appreciate the opportunity to also make that transition. Classes, groups, and activites are often scheduled in the evening. Sign up for a couple, even if it's not your favorite thing. Libraries, community centers, and small colleges offer a wide range of interesting events you might enjoy. Take a class, learn a skill, or join a bookclub.

For those evenings you will be alone, make something special for yourself. Try new recipes, invent one, or dig out a family recipe and have a go at it. Make a dessert. Mealtime should be a relaxing and pleasurable time of the day. When that twinge of loneliness sets in, call someone, post a blog, or write in your journal.

Prioritizing yourself seems to be a lost art, especially when you are sad and missing someone. We're usually good friends to everyone else, so be a good friend to yourself. Paying attention to emotional needs is part of the healing process. Learning to like living alone is a good prerequisite to living with someone else. It means you value good company.

The person you lost had you on the top of their priority list. You still deserve to be there.

Take care,
Judy