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Blogs by CJ Heck
Feeling Invisible 6/9/2011 6:48:53 AM
Have you ever felt invisible? I realize how strange that sounds and, until just recently, I've never felt that way either. It all started about a month ago, when I began to feel a kind of inertia. I didn't have much energy, I had no inspiration to write at all, even silly phrases and quotes wouldn't come to me. And with the exception of one or two short visits, even Dinahh was being scarce (invisible). I just felt sort of blah ... invisible.
I told Robert about it and he said not to worry, that I should relax and enjoy the peace and quiet. He said it happens like that sometimes when the universe wants you to rest up because they have something planned for you that's going to take a lot of energy. He said he looked at my Astrology Chart and things will drastically change for me after spring. He sees three different things in my chart that are rare, things that tell him I'm going to be busy.
Then, about two weeks ago, I started having these goofy visions while I slept, which made no sense at all. The first was a crossword puzzle that filled my entire field of vision. While I looked at it, faces appeared in each of the spaces where a letter should go, hundreds of them. That was the sum total of the vision.
A couple of nights later, I had a vision where I was sitting up in a tree. (I loved climbing as a child, so this was really nice, actually). Suddenly, a face appeared in each leaf, all over the tree. This time, I could see thousands of faces dangling like leaves.
Then the night before last, I had a vision where I was walking on a gravel path through a beautiful flower garden. There were flowers of every color and scent surrounding me and I felt happy. Then, just like the leaves on the tree, each flower became a face. There were thousands of flower faces everywhere I looked.
I call these visions because they're different from my dreams. In a vision, your senses work just like when you're awake. You can hear the wind, smell the ocean or flowers, hear leaves blowing, feel and hear the crunch of stones underfoot. A vision is like really being in a place, while a dream has a fantasy quality and the senses are turned off.
Now, I told you that, so I could tell you this ... last night before sleep, I talked to Robert about the crazy visions again. Then, just before sleep, Dinahh appeared and told me, "Catherine, do not joke. You must look more carefully. Look closer into what you have been shown."
Then I was briefly shown all three visions again. This time, I looked deeper into the crossword puzzle, the tree, and the flowers. There, in the middle of each, were Robert and me. Now I'm really puzzled, and Dinahh left me to figure it out, like he does most of the time. He's big on me finding my own answers ...
This morning, I thought about it and I believe the visions had to do with my feeling invisible. I think it was the universe's way of letting me know that no one is ever invisible. Each life is unique and valuable. Each of our lives touch so many other lives and we're all important, and important to each other, too. Everything is just as it should be.
If my astrology chart is right, and I believe it must be, what I've been feeling is temporary, the calm before the storm, if you will, but a storm that's on its way. I love storms ...