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Blogs by Mary Terzian
Which language first? 5/5/2014 11:53:50 AM
The unforeseen consequences of learning foreign languages. I suffer from a problem I hope few writers have. When I wake up in the morning, I am not frustrated by a blank screen but by the worry of “Which language will assault me?” in my half-lucidity, even though English is the most frequently-used vernacular in my life nowadays.
I am still vitally attached to my ethnic group, carrying an umbilical chord that will not be cut off. Other languages, through which I waded at one time or another, have become part of my subconscious as well, but, in times of crisis my mother tongue emerges like a jealous lover fighting over the beloved. Certain foreign expressions learned in my lifetime, key words that represent a whole psyche in the original language like "Kvetch, Kismet or Khoutsbah” have seeped into my vocabulary because they are so colorful that they save a whole paragraph of explanations. They defy interpretation. I can’t help introducing these for their intrinsic value.
Thus, caught in a maze of different sounds, my initial morning outpour on the screen is an esperanto of thoughts, waiting to be unscrambled. As I get older I find it hard to recall the exact expression that I need in English, though I remember what it rhymes to, like saying "fit the spot" instead of "hit the spot". An equivalent expression in some other language may be pounding my brains flat. A dictionary will not help, a thesaurus maybe. I may recall the exact word later, give it a day or a month. Then it becomes a triumphant "Eureka!!!" as if I have found a diamond mine. Coming from a different language I have to make doubly sure that I am arranging my words in a comprehensible sequence. You see, words have to fit in just like a song in the right ambiance, literally, musically and emotionally.
When I was a teenager, during one summer vacation I decided to learn all the words in our French dictionary by heart. Tall job. I am still sorry I didn't. It might have kept my mind lucid, but then . . . my English might have suffered from the multicultural jargon that would follow. I would become a writer with scant readers. I’m glad the "Kiss (keep it simple, stupid!) principle, helped me stay on the right track. You do understand what I am writing about, don’t you?
