While searching the Internet, I found an assignment done by Tim Casey in 2008 at SUNY Cortland.
Tim''s assignment was to prepare an assignment for a 11th grade English class. Tim''s idea was to compare and contrast two poems. While he went a bit overboard in his assignment description and requirements to the point where he would scare most 11th graders, you may find Tim''s sample essay interesting. I didn''t entirely agree with his assessment, especially when he called Spiderman''s dialect as childish… It was more, Elmer Fuddish. ;-)
Poems:
Maybe Dats Your Pwoblem Too
Jim Hall
All my pwoblems who knows,
maybe evwybody's pwoblems is due to da fact,
due to da awful twuth dat I am
SPIDERMAN.
I know, I know.
All da dumb jokes:
No flies on you, ha ha,
and da ones about what do I do wit all doze extwa legs in bed.
Well, dat's funny yeah. But you twy being
SPIDERMAN for a month or two.
Go ahead.
You get doze cwazy calls fwom da Gubbener
askin you to twap some booglar
who's only twying to wip off color TV sets.
Now, what do I cawre about TV sets?
But I pull on da suit, da stinkin suit,
wit da sucker cups on da fingers,
and get my wopes and wittle bundle of equipment
and den I go flying like cwazy
acwoss da town fwom woof top to woof top.
Till der he is.
Some poor dumb color TV slob
and I fall on him and we westle a widdle
until I get him all woped.
So big deal. You tink when you
SPIDERMAN
der's sometin big going to happen to you.
Well, I tell you what.
It don't happen dat way.
Nuttin happens.
Gubbener calls, I go.
Bwing him to powice,
Gubbener calls again,
like dat over and over.
I tink I twy sometin diffunt.
I tink I twy sometin excitin like wacing cawrs.
Sometin to make my heart beat at a difwent wate.
But den you just can't quit being sometin like
SPIDERMAN.
You SPIDERMAN for life.
Fowever.
I can't even buin my suit.
It won't buin.
It's fwame wesistent.
So maybe dat's youwr pwoblem too, who knows.
Maybe dat's da whole pwoblem wif evwytin.
Nobody can buin der suits, dey all fwame wesistent.
Who knows?
Deadly Routine
Ronald W. Hull
Wake-up. Out of bed.
Drag yourself to shower.
Stomach same old cereal,
At this ungodly hour.
Two cups of coffee,
Your head to clear.
Set out for work,
And drive your dear.
Outsourced parenting,
Was once the rage.
Now it is just,
Checked off the page.
Into the fast lane,
For a long commute.
Many stop and goes later,
We slide into the chute.
Of programmed tedium,
In our cubicled space.
A cog in the machinery,
Of corporate waste.
Take all the breaks,
That get you by.
Slip a long lunch,
Surf on the sly.
Have to leave early,
My child, you see.
Fight schoolyard traffic,
And errands for thee.
Microwave dinner,
Or fast food tonight.
Must catch the game,
Or not living right.
Pour a double,
And pay the bills.
Will they ever end?
These childhood ills?
Throw in a video,
And check the e-mail.
This life your living,
Is a private jail.
So it's off to bed.
To dream the same dream.
How to get rid of this boring life,
In your mind's endless scheme.
And then you get up,
And do it all over again.
Sample Essay
Tim Casey 11-19-08
English Sample Essay
After reading Jim Hall's “Maybe Dats Your Pwoblem Too” and Ronald W. Hull's “Deadly Routine,” it is clear that both poems thematically deal with the struggle of the individual. In these specific cases, the authors highlight the struggle of being an individual in a society that expects people to act a certain way. Both Jim Hall and Ronald Hull use literary and poetic devices to bring this thematic element to the reader's attention.
Jim Hall's poem focuses on Spiderman and his desire to be somebody else. Spiderman is struggling to be an individual because society says he has to be Spiderman. The poem is written in a very interesting dialect that makes the character sound childish. For example, Hall writes, “You get doze cwazy calls fwom da Gubbener / askin you to twap some booglar.” When looking at the words it is clear that this is very serious subject matter. Spiderman is being called up by the governor to stop a burglary. The use of the childish dialect reveals the struggle that Spiderman is having trying to be “himself,” and not what people expect him to be. This dialect makes Spiderman seem like a small child whining to his parents because he “doesn't want” to do what they expect of him. The poem goes on to describe how Spiderman does not want to be Spiderman anymore. He says, “I tink I twy sometin excitin like wacing cawrs. / Sometin to make my heart beat at a difwent wate.” Although Spiderman is exciting to everyone else, he is bored with the routine of his life. He wants to be an individual. Also, Jim Hall uses an interesting play on words with the word “wate.” Without the dialect, Spiderman is saying he wants to do something that will make his heart beat at a different rate, but it can also be read that he wants his heart to beat at a different weight. Spiderman's heart is heavy because he is trapped being someone he knows he is not. The poem ends with a grand metaphor about Spiderman trying to burn his suit. The speaker says that he is Spiderman for life because his suit is “fwame wesistent.” His suit is a metaphor for his individuality. He can never be anything other than Spiderman because that is who everyone thinks he is. This is the struggle that Spiderman is dealing with throughout the entire poem. Jim Hall makes this connection more powerful because he brings it home to the reader. He says that, “Nobody can buin der suits, dey all fwame wesistent.” Jim Hall wants the reader to know that everyone is locked into their “place” in society and that it is very hard to break out and become an individual. Ronald Hull's poem, “Deadly Routine,” deals with the same theme, but approaches it in a much more traditional way.
Ronald Hull's poem, “Deadly Routine,” deals with a character who is tired of the monotony of his life. Similar to Jim Hall's poem, the speaker seems to be stuck in his place and has no idea how to break out and become an individual. One of the main poetic devices that Ronald Hull uses to convey this meaning is the rhyme scheme. Throughout a majority of the poem he uses an A/B A/B rhyme scheme. This monotony and sameness of the rhyme scheme highlights the monotony and sameness of the character's life that he/she is desperately trying to break out of. Another device Ronald Hull uses is the form of the poem. Each line is brief and to the point. This makes the poem feel like a long list of things the character is required to to in his/her day. Each one of these notes is being “ Checked off the page.” This shows the struggle the character is having at being an individual because his/her life is devoted to the same list of things everyday with no control. This idea is solidified in the line, “This life your living, / Is a private jail.” The metaphor of the character's life being a private jail shows the helplessness of the character being an individual instead of a pawn in society. The author also links the end of the poem back to the beginning creating a circular feeling. This creates an endless poem that once again emphasizes the lack of control and individuality that the character has in his/her life.
Both poems deal with the same controlling idea of the struggle of the individual. Spiderman and the unnamed narrator in “Deadly Routine” are stuck in the endless repetition of their boring lives. They both want to break out of their routine and become individuals who have control over their destiny. Jim Hall and Ronald W. Hull use specific poetic and literary devices such as dialect, metaphor, word play, rhyme scheme, and form to accentuate the theme they want the reader to come away with after reading their poems.
My book of poetry is being redone by me, I have a beautiful cover designed and the book will have a few more than 200 poems in it. I am going to have it printed on demand here in Canada. When it is done I will let you know when it is done and if anyo
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