The Right to Bear Arms!

My husband tries to control me.

My husband isn't romantic.

My husband doesn't manage money well.

My husband won't go to church.

My husband isn't motivated.

My husband drinks/abuses drugs.

My husband puts his family and friends before me.

My husband can't find a job.

My husband is discouraged.

My husband isn't___doesn't___ can't ___ or won't __

You may be experiencing one of the situations listed above. Hopefully it's only for a season. But when it seems as if you've been weathering the storm for an unbearably long time, I recommend that you talk to the One who can do something about it. That is my theme, my battle cry and those are the words I stand on.

Women traditionally seek solace in each other by talking out our problems and frustrations among those we feel we can trust. In most cases that's a healthy way to avoid or reduce stress. It does wonders when you're feeling low, to be able to chat with a girlfriend who can just allow you to vent and not help you pack your bags every time your husband leaves the toilet seat up. However when there is a persistent, crucial issue that needs to be resolved it takes more than rounding up the girls for an afternoon or weekend long session of husband bashing.

As Christians we dutifully recite "the just shall live by faith" (Romans 1:18) and "now faith is the substance of things hoped for; the evidence of things not seen" (Hebrews 11:1) but when the rubber meets the road we have to go beyond regurgitating a string of words many of us learned as children in Sunday School.

We're sometimes blindsided by a situation and don't have the opportunity to address it in a carefully worded prayer. Therefore, those of us who haven't spouted celestial wings yet do whatever comes naturally. We argue, hurl accusations, yell, throw a tantrum, plead, negotiate, and so on; exhausting all known reactions to your husband's shortcomings. But the wise thing to do is to consult the Lord. Cover hubby with prayer in anticipation that the results will be blessings beyond what you could even have imagined.

There's more to covering your husband than just asking God to fix him. There's a clause, if you will. While you're on your knees reporting him to THE AUTHORITY, ask HIM (God) to show you yourself and how you really fit into the picture. Ask Him to shine the light on you and how, as offbeat as it may sound, you might actually be contributing to the situation that you're so perplexed about. Could you handle things better? Are things as bad as they seem or are you watching/listening to someone who is telling you they are? What are your true motives? In getting the answers to these questions you might learn that the change actually needs to come from you. In any event, the prescription to cure a malfunctioning husband is a fully functioning prayer life.

A Holy Appointment

Do you realize that the moment you got married, you received a heavenly assignment? You alone have been appointed the most powerful position on earth where your husband is concerned. That is to operate as his personal prayer warrior, his spiritual shield and covering. You are his armor bearer.  God honors and will hear the fervent, effectual prayers of a woman who is petitioning Him on behalf of the man He gave her. Your prayer warrior position requires that you pray for him day in and day out, in season and out of season. Even, and perhaps especially, after he's angered or hurt you. I said after because I know there are only a select few who can pray while they are in the midst of an emotionally charged conversation or situation. But when you've had an opportunity to create some distance between yourself and the controversy, prayer is in order. There is no value in spitting out a of sarcastic imitation of prayer during the heat of an argument with your husband, just to show him that you're holier than he is. They call that hypocrisy.

Certainly you'll want God to save an unsaved or backslidden husband; but even husbands whose Holy Ghost is dripping from their coat tails need to be covered in prayer. In the most ideal marital situations, it is still the wife's duty to consistently keep the shepherd of her home lifted in prayer. Pray for the Lord's anointing, plead the blood of Jesus for natural as well as spiritual protection. Pray for his finances, pray for him as a decision maker.

Also pray for people and situations that concern him. Pray for those he reports to - and for those who report to him, his co-workers. Pray for your in-laws, his friends and others who he is influenced by. Pray for his heart (men are masters at camouflaging their emotions). Pray for his dreams, that those seemingly impossible doors be opened for him.

Pray for every aspect of your husband's life, believing the outcome with be fulfilled, according to God's perfect will. If you feel your prayers are bouncing, enlist a seasoned, reputable prayer partner, perhaps an older woman who you know is rooted and grounded in the Word.

Walk in Victory

Speak in the affirmative. Act as though the work is already done. Operate as if your life depended upon your belief in the prayers you pray. Be a living example of the adage that says your attitude determines your altitude.  Expect change.