No One’s Watching: An Alien Abductee’s Story
New York Premiere: Thursday March 23rd at 6:30 PM
Two Boots Pioneer Theater
3rd Street btwn Ave. A & B
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Jeffrey Lyons calls No One’s Watching, “The greatest movie alive! Uuuuh…I mean if it were alive...that would make it…by default, right?”

Roger Ebert says, “No One’s Watching: An Alien Abductee’s Story? Hardly! I’m watching it now! This is almost as good as that time Siskel died! Guess where my thumb is!”

Lisa Schwarzbaum of Entertainment Weekly raves, “Remember when I gave The 13th Warrior an A, calling it, ‘The most unexpectedly audacious, exhilarating, wildly creative adventure thriller I've seen in ages’? I wish I were male so you could hack my nuts off with a Ginsu. Oh, No One’s Watching? Didn’t see it.”

And Jerry Mathers as “The Beaver.”

Okay, okay those aren’t real reviews. Hell, those aren’t even real people; I just made them up now. It’s called the power of imagination, people, and for that, you use YOUR MIND.

I do have real reviews for this lil’ flick o’ mine. So here now, for your reading pleasure, I give to you who bought tickets in advance…peace of mind.

"A rare and truthful journey into the world of a real human being who might be abducted by aliens. Jeremy Vaeni is playful and inventive as the lead character in a strange autobiographical saga, and yes: You will laugh! (There is romance.) You will cry! (There is nakedness.) But most important, you will think.”
--Nancy Birnes, Editor-In-Chief, UFO Magazine

“[C]ompelling… extremely rich in discomfort and tension...really good stuff.”
--Charlotte Cousins, Smogdance Film Festival Director

"Something strange is going on and this film is not afraid to examine the tough questions. I will be thinking about this movie for a long, long time. Except for the naked parts, which I am now trying to forget. Where is screen memory when you need it?"
--William J. Birnes, NY Times Best-Selling Author of The Day After Roswell

AND MATCHING MY EQ:

“[T]here’s something about him that lends itself well to this documentary. He’s just a fascinating guy to watch…. 7.0 out of 10.”
-- Alex Riviello, www.creature-corner.com

You can read more of Alex’s review at his website but doing so may spoil some of the surprises in the film. You’ve been warned.

Now go forth! And buy tickets here:

http://www.tix.com/Event.asp?Event=48624


See You At The Movies!

Jeremy Vaeni
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www.valiens.com