I’m on a
as need gift basis
I’m getting my gifts
as
I need them
for instance
had a dinner party last Saturday
shopped for presents Saturday afternoon
as needed
tonight exchanging with neighbors
today shopping for neighbors
so
there are worse things
the problem is
that in panic I am spending way too much money
in panic shop mode
my wallet is far too abused
and perhaps my gifts aren’t so thoughtful
more like candles and lotions and
soaps
now there’s nothing wrong with candles and
lotions and soaps
except that
I really spent twenty dollars for two bars of soap
I did
and I am ashamed
cute packaging and all
but Twenty Dollars
is that nuts
for crying out loud
it was soap
ivory is what like two bucks
it sucks
and so like I have for every year of my
unadult life I say
next year
next year this is not going to happen to me
next year
I am going to plan
I’m going to do like soooo many people do
the good people
the smart people
the people that have their act together
I am going to
be
prepared
I am going to shop all year
and tuck away
just the right gifts for all the bad boys and girls
that make
The
List
and there will be no more of this
binge shopping
standing in 10 deep lines
while people dig for coupons
and I’m sweating knowing that
I really shouldn’t be spending this money
I really shouldn’t be
but
there it is
I am
I do
and I will
because
I’m in panic shop mode
love to bitch some more but gotta run
gotta get that shopping done

merry Christmas
hope my friends
like
soap
HA