We sat on the plane some years ago
Watched the fat lady waddle down the isle
Her girth was awesome, my word she was broad
As broad as her cheek to cheek smile

I turned around and made a joke to my wife
"Why I believe she's coming this way"
But my joke soon backfired, to my surprise
When she sat down beside us to stay

She tried the extension strap, it took some time
But she made it with some great difficulty
And I thought 'what will happen from now till we land
Should we both be in need of a pee'

When dinner was served in our three row seats
She leaned over to use my wife's tray
'Cause her own wouldn't open, I kid you not
Not an inch would her seat tray sway

"I'm still hungry," she said, so I gave her my bun
Then my wife turned and gave her a sweet
"Why thank you," she said, "you are most kind
This really is such a great treat"

But they say mockings catching, I know this is true
And on this note I really must say
On our last flight together, my seat belt was tight
And my belly pushed real hard on the tray

So I'd better do something, and do it with haste
Or it's quite plain for everyone to see
The fat man waddling up the isle toward your seat
Well, some day, that fat man, may be me

                             G J Tate