By Mike Marino
There’s no business like show business! However, when you can mix dancers in fishnets with lovable singing psychopaths it’s a gold mine! Mike Marino, the playwright and theatrical empressario will be producing a series of murder musicals in Central Park. What better place for a murder than Central Park! Move over Shakespeare, Jack the Ripper is back in town...and this time it’s personal.
The entire cultural event was inspired by the Amy Fisher Comic Book Series. She didn’t actually kill anyone, but when the cast hits the stage and breaks into a rousing edition of “Long Island Lolita” it’s a killer performance culminating with Joey Buttafuco in fishnets doing a duet with Amy Fisher singing “You’re Sixteen, You’re beautiful and You’re mine”
The outdoor series will also feature “The Manson of La Mancha” where mansions replace windmills and mass murder takes the place of impossible dreams. Justin Bieber in his own never ending “impossible dream” to man-up his image, will star in the role as Charles “Chuckie” Manson.
Don’t miss “Hello Clarice!” starring Hannibal Lechter and Clarice Starling reprising there earlier off-Broadway roles in “Hello Dolly” Joining the cast as the transvestite psychopath, Buffalo Bill Clinton, will be the hilarious Hillary Clinton (no makeup required) wowing the crowds in the pit with solo renditions of “Don’t You Hurt My Precious” and “Put the Locomotion Lotion On”
Bundy On Broadway!!! It’s about time Dead Ted got his shot at the bright lights. Ted’s voice has never been better. He’s won acclaim on Florida’s Death Row Dinner Theater for his remake of “First Cut is the Deepest” and “Killing Me Softly”
Not all is art in the dark park, the kids will love the John Wayne Gacy-Barnum and Bailey Circus complete with Killer Klowns from outer space. Yes, Spacey Gacy is coming to town...if you think Pennywise was a riot...you ain’t see nothing yet!
If you missed the first salvo, don’t miss Albert De Salvo! Call Ticket Master now and reserve your tickets for “The Boston Strangler Meets the Son of Sam” also starring the son of Sam Elliot as they do a rousing rendition of “Dirty Water” by the Standells...ah yes...Lovers, Muggers, and Thieves..Boston Your My Town!”
Hungry for dinner theater? What Made Milwaukee famous? Beer? Nope! Jeffrey Dahmer. Fun filled moments recreated on stage where Jeffrey’s mother and Jeff are sitting at the dinner table eating a Jeffrey Dahmer Happy Meal he just cooked. Mom looks at Jeff and says, “I really don’t like your friends, Jeffrey.” He replies with quick witted Mel Brooks confidence., “Then try the Mashed Potatoes instead” It’s Theater of the Absurd you won’t find in the ‘burbs! Refreshments available at the Jim Jones Kool-Aid Concession stands or feast on Corn on Macabre from the Edgar Allen Poe food carts….soon you too will feel like singing Helter Skelter. One warning... if a stranger comes up to you and says “What’s Your Sign?” He’s not trying to be fresh...it’s only the Zodiac Killer.