When Mom and I would drive from Saint Louis to Ironton to visit family, she was constantly intrigued at the rock formations' various strata and would comment (questioning out loud for an answer) about how the tree grew horizontally out of the rocks then vertically to reach their tremendous heights. I knew she was reallly asking me to give her "my" understanding of how such a thing could happen, e.g., How'd those trees start to grow there in the first place?
I'd usually answer with ease. "Mom, birds eat seeds and then rest on the rocks. When they poop, seeds come out, too, and the poop acts like paste to hold the seeds in place. Then, the sun warms them, it rains, they take seed and start to grow. They must grow straight out of the rock and when they're past the rocks, they start growing straight up towards the sky." She seemed satisfied with the answer and wanted to know how I "knew" such things.
Hard to explain to your Mom that you just seem to know some things intuitively. So, I would say, "Just think for a moment, Mom. Why do trees grow on either side of a fence in some field?" She usually was silent, waiting for my answer. "Mom, birds land on top of the fence with their heads facing north and their tails facing south or east and west. They land there after eating and have to poop. When they do, seeds come out, too, and the poop is like glue and holds the seeds in place so they can germinate and start to grow. That's how trees grow on both sides of the fence 'cause the birds don't always face the same way." She would laugh and then fall asleep the rest of the drive. I'd look over at her sleeping, hunkered down in the seat and see just the faintest of a smile on her face and knew she was satisfied--for the time being--with the answers I had given her.
I cannot count the number of times we had the same conversation while traveling. But, it was fun and a memory that I will hold dearly now that she is in Heaven and gotten the right answer from The Creator of all things.
The Wholly Book of Doo-Doo-Rot-on-Me is adult satirical humor featuring adult language and adult content, and the work is a parody of the Old Testament Book of Deuteronomy.
