This week, Studio Reader Stan meets again with Ms. Pantsworth, an executive at Demure Studios.
Studio Reader Stan enters Ms. Pantsworth’s office. As usual, she puffs away on her big cigar.
Ms. Pantsworth: Thanks for coming in, Studio Reader Stan.
Studio Reader Stan: You said it was urgent. Does that mean you actually read one of my scripts and want to buy it?
Ms. Pantsworth: No, of course not. I do need your help, though.
Studio Reader Stan: How so?
Ms. Pantsworth: I figured out the one true key to never losing my job as a studio executive. Go ahead and guess what it is?
Studio Reader Stan: Uh, you make consistently great movies that people will love?
Ms. Pantsworth: Not even close. The answer is – never do anything.
Studio Reader Stan: Ever?
Ms. Pantsworth: Ever. See, the problem all my peers keep having is they make movies that are expensive flops, and then of course, at the end of the year, they get the axe.
Studio Reader Stan: Which kind of goes back to my strategy of making movies that people will actually like.
Ms. Pantsworth: Nah, there’s too much risk involved with that. My way’s better. Since the end of last June, I not only haven’t greenlighted a movie, I haven’t done a drop of anything that could be called work. That’s over six months... And I’m still employed.
Studio Reader Stan: And this is something you're proud of?
Ms. Pantsworth: I consider it my greatest accomplishment.
Studio Reader Stan: Oh-kay. So what do you need me for?
Ms. Pantsworth: I need help coming up with more reasons for why I never work.
Studio Reader Stan: And you’re so impressed by my creativity that you think I’ll come up with great excuses?
Ms. Pantsworth: No, I think even if you squealed on me, none of my peers would actually listen to you, so you’re not a threat. Let’s get started after my daily two hour visit to the gun range. Today’s Bazooka Monday.
Tune in next week for more of Studio Reader Stan's adventures...
Deputy Dave Jenkins sets out to find the murderer of the local high school principal, aided by a voice from the grave that is sometimes helpful and sometimes misleading.
"Murder isn't usually this funny."
Amazon reviewer
