Monday, October 23, 2006, 10:15 a.m., C.D.T., Nashville, Tennessee~

Dear Jenna Aurora and Michael~

I am sorry for not writing; but things have been happening, and as a result, my letter writing got away from me. I hope you understand why I haven't written. I am not mad at you in any way, but I am so far behind now it isn't funny!

I did write some e-mails (Sari and Nikolas Constantinos in Finland, Audrey Jackson in California, Kendra Mae Williams in California, Betty Jo Ciagalore in Florida, Wyndi Storm Piestala in Arizona, and Eileen Weston in Texas), so at least I am starting to make some headway. It is a long, drawn out process though, and it will be a long while before I am caught up. *Sighhh* That's what you get when you have so many friends! LOL

How are you guys doing? How is little Mattaq? I bet he is getting big! I hope he is over his earlier health concerns; it is scary when you have a baby that is born premature, and you don't know what the outcome is going to be.

Trust me, I have been there. My last child was premature, and she lived for 16 days, just a little over two weeks. She was too small and sick to survive, and it ended up that she got meningitis in the NICU nursery; that was what ended up killing her. It was devastating, one of the worst things a parent can ever go through!

I also ended up losing my other two (biological) children: I lost a son (six days) to SIDS, and I lost my other son to meningitis; he died on what  would have been his fourth birthday.

It was  terrible, and it got to the point to where I was wondering if I was a bad mother because all three children I birthed ended up dying. It took a very long time to let go of the guilt and realize that what had happened was not my fault; it was just part of life's unfortunate circumstances.

But God knew we wanted a family, so He blessed us in bringing children nobody else wanted, children with bleak futures, severe handicaps, or emotional trauma, and even though there were problems at first, we all learned to adjust to one another, and now it has gotten to the point to where Bill or I cannot imagine our family without any of the children! We now have fifty-five children, ranging in age from two on up to twenty-four-and-a-half, and they have blessed us immeasurably with their courage, their spunk, and their drive to succeed in life.

I didn't think we would end up with so many children, but it was a fluke, and now we have to learn to love our kids and treat them as equals. We have fallen in love with each and every one of them, and they are growing like weeds! It seemed like only yesterday when they were tiny babies; now the oldest has children of her own (six; I am a grandma now! :) ), and the youngest is going to be three next year.

God has shown us through the children just what love and caring can do. They are among the best behaved children I have ever had the pleasure to run across, and they make me proud to be their maman! :)

Bill is enjoying his role as grandpa; whenever the grandkids are over, we are in the middle of all their questions, their games, their activities, and it is like I am looking at my own children all over again. I get sentimental, because I wish I can keep my own kids little, but of  course, you know that will never happen, Kids grow, and they grow quick; but they still bring us endless moments of joy that I can't describe!

Well, how is the weather up there? Here it is chilly: temps in the upper sixties to lower seventies, lows in the 30's and 40's at night. We have had to cover some of our plants and vegetation, and we have had to turn the heat on. We have also broken out our winter gear so we don't freeze, and we are adjusting to the colder temps. quite well. I hope it isn't too cold up there; when I was there late last month, I thought I was going to turn into a polar bear! LOL It was soo collllllld up there in Alaska! I don't know how you guys do it; give me the warmer temps any day! :)

Well, this is all that is new here. I will write again soon. Take care, Michael and Jenna, and God bless you both! Give little Mattaq a  hug and kiss from me, and know that I am always thinking of you guys! I miss you when you aren't here (or vice versa)!

(((HUGS))) and much love, your Tennesssee friend, Louie May. :D