Studio Reader Stan meets with studio executive, Mr. Shine, of Wordsmith Studios.
Studio Reader Stan hands screenplay coverage to Mr. Shine.
Studio Reader Stan: Here’s the coverage you requested, Mr. Shine.
Mr. Shine: This looks like way too much reading, Studio Reader Stan. Can’t you just draw the synopsis for me?
Studio Reader Stan: Huh?
Mr. Shine: Words are a waste of time these days. It’s all about the visuals.
Studio Reader Stan: But doesn’t there still have to be some words?
Mr. Shine: Not if I can help it. Know what I preach to aspiring writers?
Studio Reader Stan: Be president of a frat ‘cause for some reason film bosses think that’s qualification enough to be a studio executive?
Mr. Shine: No, I tell that to producers. For writers, I say forget learning about the craft of screenwriting and go get a marketing degree.
Studio Reader Stan: So you’re only interested in writers who don’t actually know anything about writing.
Mr. Shine: You got it. I’ve completely stopped hiring scribes to rewrite any of our scripts anymore.
Studio Reader Stan: So who’s doing the rewriting?
Mr. Shine: My marketing team. It’s beautiful. They never whine about the useless things that writers are always bugging me about.
Studio Reader Stan: You mean like having a plot that makes sense, or having multi-dimensional characters, or smarter dialogue?
Mr. Shine: Exactly. People don’t go to the movies for that.
Studio Reader Stan: What do they go for then?
Mr. Shine: They go because they like the poster. And you know who makes the posters? The marketers.
Studio Reader Stan: But what if after actually seeing the film, they hate it because it lacked all the qualities that make movies enjoyable?
Mr. Shine: It won’t matter by then. They already bought an opening weekend ticket. Game, set and match – I win... Now go home and draw this coverage then get it back to me.
Start following Studio Reader Stan in his comic strip at www.StudioReaderStan.com.
Homer's Ill Iliad & Odd Sea Odyssey (420 pages) is an adult satire/parody rewrite of the classic stories of the 10 year Trojan War and of the 10 year adventure of Odysseus trying to return home to his native Ithaca.
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