A Trucker's Story

It's been two weeks since I've seen your face. The last time we talked on the phone you hung up without saying good-bye. You said everything was fine and I had nothing to worry about. My heart tells me different. It says you love me but I know you are flesh and blood. I know you need the attention I can't give you from here on the road. The load of freight has to get through and my
heart will just have to wait. I am afraid I'm going to lose you. I can't imagine a life
without you in it. You are my soul.

The road is never-ending and lonely. The money is never enough and the hours
are long. When my day is done I will not be in your arms. I'll be in a truck stop in a
place I don't know surrounded by strangers that all have the same story to tell. I've
heard it a million times before and don't think I can bear it again.

When we met your eyes sparkled when you looked at my tractor shining in the
sun. The paint doesn't seem to shine as bright these days. When we met you love
the smell of the diesel that came from the stacks but now it makes you sick to
your stomach. When we met you loved the sound of the motor as it roared to life,
but now you say it makes too much noise and complain it might wake the
neighbors.

All I want to do is come home to you but the cost of fuel is too high. The mortgage
is late and the car insurance is past due. The roof leaks and the washing machine
doesn't work. If I take one more load before coming home maybe I can get the
bills caught up and call the repairman. I know it means giving up another weekend
at home with you but what choice do I have? The bills have to be paid.

The white lines rush beneath me as I think of you. I have so far to go and it feels
like I'm never going to get there. I want to stop and eat but I don't have the time.
Not now. Maybe I'll stop later. Right now I have to log some miles. I know I'm
making good time and my log book is legal for a change.. If the trucking Gods are
smiling on me maybe the weigh station ahead will be closed. Your favorite song
comes on the radio and it makes me smile. I think of of your face and the last time
we kissed. God I miss you.

I pick up the cell phone to call you and tell me not to worry and that everything is
all right. I know it's not. I hear the pain in your voice. You used to love me. You
used to love our life and you used to love us. What happened baby? When did it
go wrong? Tell me what to do. I want to ask you these things but my foolish pride
won't let me. I still love you as much as the day we met but you are a woman who
is about to stray. I don't want to believe it but I know it's true . Honestly I don't even
blame you. My heart is breaking.

I tell you I won't be home over the weekend because I'm going to take an extra
load. We need the money. You don't seem surprised. You don't even sound that
upset. Why should you be? I've done it to you a hundred times before. I tell you
good-bye and that I'll be home as soon as I can.



I am a trucker and this is a story I heard on the CB today.


I hear this story almost every day. I have lived it myself but that was years ago  
copyright 2004 Steven R. Zellers