The Spider's Web Part 4

The sweet smell of the sea started to permeate the dining room. Vincent could distinguish a slight difference between the smell of the Atlantic and the Mediterranean. This time the odor of iodine was accentuated. Even his lungs seemed to breathe better.

After dinner, Vincent would have preferred to stay outside in the fresh sea air, but he realized that he couldn't again leave his father alone. Now as Vincent lay on his bed, the ship began to develop a swaying movement which tickled his stomach.

The sea was churning and agitated. The waves, which had almost been calm before, now started to sway the ship. As the ship proceeded, the movement became unpleasant. The senior de Montaigne, who until then had never been sick, began to vomit. Vincent, who had never experienced such seasickness, became upset. The delicious dinner that they had had for the first time on the ship had become a dead weight in the senior de Montaigne's stomach. Soon, their lovely stateroom was covered with retching. Vincent had to clean his father like a baby. His father's condition worsened every minute. Vincent spent his time cleaning the cabin, changing to fresh towels; the smell became unbearable.

Vincent had never seen his father sick before. This was the first time that he was faced with such an experience. As long as he had known his father, he had never had to take care of him. Now, he was alone; his father was suffering a great deal and his face had turned pale. Vincent became nervous for the first time in his life. Until then, his father had taken care of him when he had been sick. Vincent felt miserable and all kinds of thoughts made him perceive the meaning of life around him. He had always taken his father's good health for granted in the past. He had never thought that his father might get sick.

Although Vincent loved his father, he had never experienced a feeling of sorrow for him. He had never thought that his father might die. As he observed his father's struggle with pain, Vincent suddenly became aware that he might lose his beloved father. This thought made him even sadder.

Vincent did not close his eyes for even a moment. His main concern and prayers were for his father's life. The thought that he might become an orphan, revived the feeling of the day his mother died. The tickling in his stomach that he had first felt after dinner, suddenly disappeared in the face of the new reality. Vincent could not see anything through the portholes. He could hear the wind battering against the side of the ship. The vessel reacted like a small box in a lake. The trip that he had dreamed of and awaited for so long had suddenly become an unwanted event. He now wished that the trip had never taken place. The thought that his father might die, precipitated  these uncomfortable feelings of abject fear in Vincent. He realized how much his father now needed his help. He could not remember ever having seen his father ill even during the first trip which had brought them from America.

Vincent was tired, frightened and sad. Just before the break of dawn, his father's pains seemed to ease. Vincent lay down on his bed to get a little relaxation, so he would be ready to help his father. At that moment, he remembered the story that his father had told him one day when Vincent asked him why his Dad was so good to him. His father had answered thus:

There was once a rich merchant who had worked through his entire life just to increase the fortune that his own father had left him. He was a miserly man. His priest’s visits ceased to be frequent, as he always turned down requests for charity to the poor. A few days before his death, the merchant suddenly remembered the priest. He asked his children to call him. However, the priest could not be reached anywhere that day. The wealthy man realized that his fortune would not help save his life. He requested that his children call his lawyer. When the lawyer came to his bedside, the rich man told him to change his last will and testament to read that he would donate his entire fortune to the church and the poor after his death. A few days later, the rich old man died.
 At that moment, the Angel of Death came to lead him on his way to his new abode. The Angel and the wealthy man entered an obscure tunnel. The Angel followed behind the merchant. The rich man kept tripping from time to time like a blind man. After a while of suffering and groping in the dark, the rich man turned to observe how the Angel was making his way, and to his surprise he discovered that the Angel had been holding a bright candle to light his path.
 The rich man had been accustomed to giving orders during his lifetime. He thus commanded the Angel:
 “Please come forward with your candle, so that I can see my way!” The Angel replied:
 “I am sorry; I cannot break the law.” The rich man became furious when he realized that for the first time in his life, his orders were not being obeyed at all. In a loud voice, he screamed at the Angel:
 “What is this powerful law of yours that I have to break my neck in this darkness?” The Angel calmly replied:
 “The light is only for those who are charitable.”
 The rich man, remembering his testament, then said to the Angel:
 “Do you know who I am?”
 “Yes!” answered the Angel. The merchant was not satisfied with the Angel's answer and continued:
 “You must be wrong. I am the most generous person in the world. I have left my entire fortune to the church and the poor.” The Angel asked:
 “When will the church and the poor receive this fortune?”
 The merchant was relieved for he now believed that the Angel had not been aware of his testament. He would certainly apologize for his mistake. He replied:
 “Right now, after my death.” The Angel answered sweetly:
 “Now I understand why I received instructions to follow you with the lit candle.” The rich man became quite happy and in the voice of a much honored man, said to the Angel:
 “All right, I excuse you. You see, charity is light. Now please come forward and light my way.” The Angel again proceeded to a question:  
 “Have you given your entire fortune as you said?”  
 “Yes sir!” proudly answered the merchant.
 “When? Was it during your lifetime?” continued the Angel.
 “Oh, yes!” swore the rich man.
 “When will the church and the poor benefit from your fortune Sir? “
The rich man became impatient and furious with these annoying angel questions and shouted loudly:
 “What are all these questions for? I will complain to your superior.”
The Angel answered firmly:
 “I receive my instructions only from the Eternal Law itself. And that Law can never be wrong. The rich man, who used to be respected, believed that the Angel was trying to wrangle with him and continued:
 “It is best that you come forward. I will forgive you.” The Angel answered:
 “I now understand that you have willed your entire fortune to be used after your death; that is why I am holding the candle behind you. You are now dead. Had you deeded your fortune for use while you were still alive, the light of the candle would have been before you and would have lighted your way.”
 The rich man felt that he had been cheated and with the disappointment sensed by an astute businessman, he said to the Angel:
 “I will call my lawyer and tell him to change the testament.”
 He now realized that this entire talk had not impressed the Angel or changed his mind. He suddenly thought of another solution and told the Angel in a patronizing voice:
 “I understand. You are a poor man who always leads the dead. I should have realized that before. Come forward with the light and I will take care of you.” The Angel did not even bother to answer.
 The dead man now realized that the Angel was very loyal to his superior, and could not be bribed. He understood that the only language that the Angel would accept was charity. He regretted having spent his entire life ignoring the priest’s exhortations for funds, while he had had such a great fortune and would have been able to satisfy the priest’s demand and help all the poor people in his town. Vincent now thought about the meaning of his Father's story. This tale had awakened in him the will to make good while there was still time.

The senior de Montaigne seemed to be relieved of pain and was in deep sleep. Vincent, for the first time now experienced a sense of responsibility. He realized how much his father had suffered in silence for all those years since the death of his wife. Vincent remembered how many times he had been sick and how much his father had taken care of him with love and devotion.
Vincent now felt that he was no longer a child. He had become an adult. He promised himself that from now on he would take on his father's responsibilities. He would give him all the love in the world. He was angry with himself for not having realized sooner that his father also needed much love and care. Vincent felt a sense of guilt. His father had sacrificed his life for him. He should have married another woman. He now wished that this trip would end as quickly as possible so that he could reward his father for all the love, goodness and care that he had lavished on Vincent for so many years.

Vincent finally understood why his father had told him the story of the Merchant and the Angel.   The ship moved with a constant speed. Father and son had missed their first sunrise together on the high seas as both were now immersed in deep sleep after such an agitated night. When Vincent awoke, the sea was calm and it was broad daylight. The night before seemed like a bad dream. All the bad feelings and sense of regret that he had felt had dissipated with the storm. Now he felt like his old self again. He could not understand how his feelings of responsibility and sorrow had disappeared with the arrival of daylight. He understood for sure that one could not ignore his own feelings. The experience was probably necessary so that he would take a fuller responsibility for his own life. His father was still soundly asleep and seemed in no pain.
Vincent stood next to him and observed him for a while.

This was the first time that he had seen his father in profound slumber. The temptation to go out on deck was strong, and he hesitated for a moment in his thoughts, then suddenly decided to dress himself fast, and took a glimpse through the porthole, from where he could see the calm blue sea. The ship was moving smoothly now. Vincent put a sweater on over his shirt and went out. When he saw the well dressed passengers on deck admiring the sea, Vincent felt that he had missed something precious. He then realized that he had missed his first sunrise at sea.

He felt sorry that the night before he had been ready to give up all this new source of happiness, and was ready to return to Paris.  Now the beauty of the turquoise sea combined with the blue sky added to his long overdue dream.  All the passengers were completely unknown to Vincent, but they all had something in common; they were all headed towards something new, although each had his own purpose and maybe his own dream. He realized that all these passengers were different from the people that he had known before. They had more experience and they were all more open to the world, with its various facets, people and languages. He wished that this journey would last very long because these feelings in the middle of the sea were a very special experience and certainly better than the dark feelings of regret and melancholy that had pervaded his heart and his entire being before.

He breathed deeply of the pure air with a little of the special smell from the sea; it made his trip agreeable and full of imagination and hope. Vincent's enthusiasm had been revived  to an even higher degree than he had yet known. The medley of passengers, the ship, the sea, the sky and the sun formed a beautiful panorama in variegated blue.

This first day aboard ship was shorter than usual, as Vincent and his father had slept all morning. His father finally joined him on deck. Vincent now cherished him like a child. The senior de Montaigne had never before experienced Vincent taking care of him and the love feeling he experience was new to him. He felt that his life was revived. They spent the day walking from deck to deck, admiring the blue sea. When evening came, Vincent and his father were again hungry, as they had abstained from food all day long. Meanwhile, Vincent had spoken to many sailors, and one of them had given him much good advice on how to behave on the ship, to prevent seasickness. When Vincent and his father went to dine in the lavishly decorated dining room, Vincent recalled the advice of a sailor, who had told him to avoid liquids. Vincent, who had not forgotten the previous night, thus advised his father to order only sandwiches. After dinner they spent a couple of hours admiring the stars which had begun to appear through the port hole while they were dining.

 Copyright Emile M. Tubiana 2009 all rights reserved