You've heard of Marley. If not, then you must be from some other planet.
Marley was the golden retriever who belonged to author John Grogan. He was touted as the world's worst dog. No matter what his owners did, the poor dog would not behave or mind his master. He got into more mischief than ten dogs put together. His story was told in the phenominal best seller, "Marley & Me".
Well, I happen to have a "Marley" of my own, in my mixed breed named "Lou-Lou". Actually, her name is "Louie", but I call her "Lou-Lou", as do many of my friends. Lou-Lou is part chihuahua, dachshund, Pomeranian, and Lord only knows what else. She is two years old, but acts more like a little puppy than a true adult.
Lou-Lou has destroyed more items than you can shake a stick at: clothes and shoes ripped to mere shreds, chewed off the arm of one of our couches (since replaced), ate objects like lipstick, eye makeup, ink pens, magic markers, plastic toys, the rubber tips of my son's crutches, erasers off of pencils, chewed up my baby boy's teddy bear, and ate more food than ten people put together.
Lou-Lou has a voracious appetite. I have repeatedly complained to our veterinarian about her eating habits; he admits that Lou-Lou definitely has a problem. A serious one. I have tried behavior therapy on her, with a licensed pet therapist, but it does't seem to be doing much good: Lou-Lou is as destructive as ever. And I am at the end of my rope with this stupid dog!!
In addition to her unusual eating habits, Lou-Lou is terrified of thunderstorms. So much so, in fact, that when a storm comes up, she goes ballistic, running through the house like a howling maniac, whining and barking in fear, leaving a trail of pee as she does, her eyes wild with fear. I try to calm her down, or try to hold her, but it does no good. It's enough to make me want to give her up; I can't handle her psychosis any longer!!
I kiddingly call Lou-Lou my canine "StormFraider". And she is exactly that!
Now with the family, she is a loving, trusting pet: she loves everybody; she doesn't know a stranger: the worst thing she could possibly do is lick them to death.
It's just all the other things that I am having issues with: her fear of storms, her eating habits, and also her penchant for escaping our yard. She runs away a lot ... and usually only to the neighbor's next door, where they have a giant, fat Norwegian Forest cat named "Elsa".
I personally think that Lou-Lou has a crush on the cat. Wouldn't be a problem excepting that Lou-Lou is not a guy. She's as female as they come. So that must mean that my dog is gay. Lovely. Something else to discuss with the vet. Sigh ... As if I don't already have more than enough worries about my dog as it is ....
