Another day we were in bed and had had a good time. Unexpectedly she told me she had many sexual fantasies and she did not know if she ought to confess them to me. She finally said sexual fantasies would have to come out from me, but with this and everything else, what she would really like would be my calling her by phone and my saying to her with hard and overbearing voice:

-Look, put on a short skirt without breeches and go to the corner of Montera Street and set up there on the pavement, that I will go there to pick you up, you vixen, bum, that I am going to fuck you up as I want, and then I will pay you twenty thousand pesetas.

I was perplexed, but I said to myself the business was interesting.

Some days went by and it was Saturday. I was at home completely bored and with no money at all. I rang her up and said:

-Look, put on a short skirt without breeches and go to the corner of Montera Street and sit down there on the pavement, that I will go there to pick you up, you vixen, bum, and then I will fuck you up and I will sob you all the money, and after this I will treat you nicely. Do you hear me, babe?

-Leopoldo, I’m sleeping.

-What?

-I’m sleeping. It was you paying me, anyway.

-Fuck off, babe. Why do you not take it more morbid if it is you paying me. I can promise my kidneys will resist longer knowing they will get some cash, though it is not much.

- .....

-Look, we can do this: You feel morbid about my paying you, and I feel the same if you pay me. You said twenty. Did you not?

-Twenty what?

-Twenty thousand.

-What?

-Twenty thousand in total.

-Fuck off, young man. I can’t remember. It is a symbolic amount. I said twenty but I could have said eighteen or nineteen.

-Hear, you said twenty, for I’ve got good memory for numbers. We agree, don’t we? Then if we haven’t got the money today, we can give credit to each other. But I would like you giving me forty, so you will have to pay me twenty in total, that I feel more morbid. I’m very excited thinking about it. And you? Did you get excited?

-No, Leopoldo, it is you paying me.

-Babe, it was an idea..... Look, I will tell you something for you to see how things are… Last year I met up a woman with whom I intimated and lied on bed. She is a banker’s wife and gets bored often. Well, the case is that I was ashamed but the first day I fucked her I asked her for some money because I was absolutely ruined. She said to me not to worry, that it was logical because I had no job. She asked me how much I needed. I said ten thousand would be enough. She gave me a card and its secret code number and told me to take out twenty-five thousand. I took out fifty thousand not realising I was doing it and forgot to give the card back to her owner. And for you to see I’m not selfish, all my friends know the card’s secret code number, to the extent that my friends of the rock’s band Desastre of whom I am always talking about, have got one of the cards… the card I mean, for ten months at least they have taken out fifty thousand every day. Look how far the affair has gone to that the group members have resigned their jobs, and I can even tell you that when they take the money out from a cash machine they always leave a message saying: ”Leo’s Pol Sporting Club” “You are the Best and the Greatest” “Desastre and Leo’s Pol Forever” And, well, still more. Look how they are that they add a message to policemen saying: “Do you know who he is, cop?” “What’s his name?” “ Pringado” “Ignorante” “Long Life Leo’s Pol.”

-And the woman hasn’t denounced the card’s theft?

-Hear, girl. It hasn’t been a theft. She is the bank chairman’s wife and I do not think she misses our card, with all she must have got… My colleagues could cause me trouble because of the card’s track… I do know where they play today. Very near your place in fact. At Central Café. I am sure they have taken out the fifty thousand already, are drinking now and will leave the messages.

-Did you say Central Café?

-Yes… Central Café.

-Hear me. Go on speaking. I’m getting up and going to the kitchen to prepare coffee. Why don’t we go to Central Café and you introduce to me the members of the band at last? At what time does the concert start?

-Well…

-What pretty funny times The Desastre must have had…

-You know already I do not coincide in ideas about this. Remember the gram they gifted me. I do not know how it could have happened, but I lost it and you were looking for it for more than two hours.

-Yeah .....

-Listen. By the way, the truth of what really happened that day is that it was you who fell asleep. Come on, babe, you were nearly coming more than ten times till you said to me: “Let me rest, please.” As if I were a whole cossacks battalion. By the way; if you go on looking for the gram and find it, you can sniff it up entire.

-Yeah..... Well, look. D’you know why I say this about dough?–she said-. Because I’m fed up of being different. I want to go out and be invited to everything like the rest.

-Well, you know, I have always taken you out somewhere. Remember I’ve taken you out five times to the restaurant below your place. And, by the way, I do not like the Chinese waitress as much as you think. She has a mouth too big and big breasts too and Chinese women cannot have them so big.

-Yeah.

-Well, then what? Have you not more fantasies?

-Yes, I do, I do. I’m getting very excited now, thinking of you… licking up a girl’s cunt and I beside you looking up how you both enjoy it. And you, while licking up her cunt, treat me roughly, and call me vixen and bum, not letting me come closer to you. And you even slap my face as you told me you would. Well, well. I’ve come really really excited. We’ll do it if you want to, because I think I will like it and I’ve never done it before. If you want to, we can do it today. Why not? Before going to the concert…

-Well. This is good news. I’ve come very hard listening to your plan and thinking about it. It will be difficult to find a girl willing to participate in such a gay event. You will see how much you enjoy it. Today is too soon to try to find her.

-What I want is to see you both fucking. I have that morbid idea. I can't put it out of my mind.

-It has excited me much more yet. We have to do it soon- I said. Only one thing...

-What? asked her.

-You know already that sooner or later one ends by telling everything some day, and for me to tell with laughter, we need some incense candles with lights off, for instance, and a sleep mask covering your eyes not to let you see and to be seeking anxiously....

 

 

 

 

Madrid

January, 1996