My grandfathers were completely different people and each left a lasting impression on a young granddaughter
MY GRANDFATHERS
I don’t know very much about my grandfathers’ history. I do know how each of them made me feel when I was a little girl and I remember stories that I heard about each. One grandfather had long passed away before I had my first child. The other left this earth when my first born was quite small. So if there ever comes a time when either of my children would like to know about their great-grandfathers on their mother’s side of the family, maybe this will be a teaser that will cause them to investigate further.
Both of my grandfathers were interesting men even though they were complete opposites. One was a good man, devoted to his family and community while the other was a womanizer who would most likely have been struck by lightning if he’d ever entered the church where my grandmother faithfully attended every Sunday morning. One made me feel safe and loved. The other terrified me with his loud laugh and jaw full of chewing tobacco.
The scary grandfather was Oscar Diamond and my grandmother divorced him in 1953 when I was just 4 years old. You would have thought that after 41 years of marriage and 6 children that my grandmother would have been used to his wandering ways and would have taken the easy route by ‘looking the other way’, but bringing home an STD was perhaps the final straw. Even though at the time the word divorce was almost a dirty word, my grandmother forged ahead. Within a year of the divorce my grandfather married the Other Woman and moved into a house within sight of my grandmother’s home.
There are two stories that stick out the most in my memories of my scary grandfather. One was a story of when Oscar and his wife, Rebecca were newlyweds. Rebecca went to church faithfully every Sunday. The distance was too far to walk so she would ride bare-back on one of the two plow horses that the couple owned. Oscar wouldn’t dare darken the door of the church but he would climb on the other horse and ride along with Rebecca to visit with his buddies at the general store until church services ended. As soon as he saw the first person start down the church steps he would high tail it over there so he could see if there were any pretty ladies to flirt with while he waited for his wife.
This particular Sunday when Rebecca came out into the sun light she spied her new husband laughing and teasing a pretty young lady. Rebecca, incensed, held her head high, and walked quickly past the giggling couple to her horse. However her anger evidently increased her strength because when she grabbed the horse’s mane and attempted to jump on his back, she kept right on going, falling in a heap in the dirt on the other side of the horse. To his credit Oscar ran to his young wife’s aid, helping her up and onto her horse. I don’t know whether there was shouting or silence as they made their way home. Either way, I’m sure Oscar got the message. It’s too bad that he had such a short memory because his attraction to the opposite sex finally landed him in Divorce Court.
The second story I remember so well about Oscar happened when I was eight years old. My younger sister was born on July 9th, which was Oscar’s birthday. After my sister’s one year birthday family get together, my mother decided to take us both to see our grandfather to give him a pair of house slippers for his birthday. We walked along a dusty road from my grandmother’s house to his in the hot July sun, with my mother holding my hand and my sister on her hip.
When we arrived Oscar was sitting in a rocking chair on his front porch chewing tobacco and spitting in an old rusty can. I don’t remember the conversation he had with my mother but I do remember that she never went up the three or four stairs to where he was sitting. She wished him happy birthday and laid the shoe box on the first step. He ignored the gift and spit tobacco at my new patent leather shoes making me jump just like in the old westerns when the bad guy shoots his gun at another’s feet making them ‘dance’. My mother’s grip on my hand increased as we turned and walked away with Oscar’s loud laughter vibrating in our ears. I don’t remember ever going back to see him again.
Some years later as Oscar lay very sick in the hospital, his home burned to the ground. As he was not trusting of the bank, not only did he lose his home, all his worldly possessions, but he also lost every dollar he had hidden in glass canning jars in the home’s cellar. I don’t know if anyone mourned his passing or if those who knew him best decided that ‘Karma’ had done its duty.
To compensate for all the meanness of one grandfather, I was given another who always told me that I was his favorite of all the grandchildren. I’m sure he told every one of us the same thing but I would glow each time he whispered in my ear that I was the best. His name was Ira Hale and he was married to Nancy Hale. To all of the little ones, they were Mom and Pop Hale.
At one point in time Pop Hale was the Chief of Police of Louisa, Kentucky. He was very serious about ‘keeping the peace’ and his sons often laughed with each other saying that Pop wouldn’t hesitate to throw any one of them in jail if they broke the law. There would be no favoritism shown when Pop was on duty.
Mom and Pop lived at the head of a ‘holler’ with no running water. There was a water pump in the kitchen, a real modern convenience as most people had to go outdoors to pump water or draw it from the well. There was also a water pump on the back porch that the sons would use to ‘wash up’ before entering the back door into Mom Hale’s always busy kitchen. With Pop having the important position in town and earning a decent salary, he decided that he would turn one of the bedrooms of their old house into an indoor toilet. This was an enormous undertaking but once finished it was a wonder to behold, complete with a claw footed bath tub right in the center of the room.
Moving into the modern world put Pop Hale on the front page of the local newspaper, which printed the story of the Chief of Police who had inside plumbing. He was truly a man ahead of his time and was missed by many who loved him when he died of black lung from working in the coal mines in his younger days.
I really enjoyed reading about your grandfathers. I'm certain you have other stories about your grandmothers as well. I was worried that you were going to give your "bad" grandfather, Oscar, top billing, but I see that you finally got around to Ira and his accomplishments, both as a wonderful person and as an innovator in the community. It must've been quite interesting to have the Chief of Police as a grandfather.
I have fond memories of two great grand parents during my childhood years. My grandfathers were not as colorful as yours, but both were quite "beaten-down" by the Great Depression and as a result had grumpy dispositions at times. I recall my paternal grandfather's famous picture of him with his two magnificent draft horses that helped him start a farm in his later years after many years of working in factories and as a chauffeur/fireman. I don't know if my grandmother ever rode bareback on one of them, but as an avid reader, she was quite romantic and the mother of seven children. And, I had a great uncle who was Fire Chief of Sheboygan, Wisconsin. He gave up and died at 98 after seven bouts with pneumonia from, his third wife told me, "a kind of black lung from eating smoke all those years."
If we don't write down our childhood experiences and impressions, generations to come will miss out. May your detailed account of two completely different grandfathers who made a lasting impression, inspire spirited discussions amongst your family as well as a quest to seek more information about other relatives.
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MY GRANDFATHERS
