A preacher learns what his words mean by an angry sinful man.
Stave has been part of this Church just over ten years. I saw him come to Christ and grow in the Spirit of God. There is always the Bible or a commentary about it in his hand. Stave asks a lot questions during Sunday school to the point of being disruptive. He is an angry man who does not want to be angry anymore. The struggle with those demons in his life is always with him. Stave declined to become leadership in this Church because of his background.
My lesson in humility began 9 weeks ago. The service just started when a man entered the door of the sanctuary. He was badly dressed in women’s clothes. One could tell that he was not a regular cross dresser by the way he wore the clothes. I saw better in college as a joke in a skit. Everything seemed to stop upon this man entering. After this awkward pause, I successfully returned to leading the congregation. After the Morning Prayer and before the sermon, the man rose and lumbered out of the sanctuary in his high-heeled shoes.
Stave followed him out and I motioned to Cal an Elder in the church to follow Stave. Stave caught up to this man just outside the church doors and asked, “Was it your intension to shock and awe this Church or is there something more you are after?” The man shrugged his shoulders and continued to his car. Stave hollered to him, “If it was something more you seek, you need to give it more of a chance.” Stave returned to his seat to hear the sermon.
After the service, while the congregation was leaving, a well-dressed suited man entered the church. Stave recognized him as the cross dresser who interrupted us the hour before. “So, there is something more you want?” Stave started with this man. The man introduced himself as Charles but his friends call him Chuck. Stave and Chuck spoke while I was busy greeting my flock as they departed for the week. It was not very long at all when I heard Stave tell Chuck he was just another member at the Church and he would grab someone with more knowledge. Cal and Stave brought Chuck into my office.
It was another ten minutes before I joined them in my office. Cal had an appointment and excused himself. I was wondering why I was there since Stave and Chuck were well into a conversation. Chuck was looking for a deeper meaning to life and Stave was the first person who ever showed concern enough to follow him and invite him back. For someone who declined to become an elder because he did not know enough, he was answering Chuck’s question with confidence in his blue collar way. Stave assured him “God can change you, he did me. You see I am angry man who took my angst out on anyone who dared to cross me.” When Chuck questioned his anger, Stave informed him, “Ten years ago I would have beaten the crap out of you for disturbing the service way you did today.”
Chuck mentioned, “I have a black belt in karate.”
“Unharnessed rage beats black belts almost every time.”
Stave wasn’t bragging about his about his exploits but he was clear about the damage he caused to his family, friends, and himself. There was real pain in the words he chose and sorrow in his heart. As they discussed Chuck’s problems, I felt like a fly on the wall listening into a private conversation. Chuck eventually admitted to being a homosexual. Stave asked, “How does that make it worse than me? God saved me, he will save you, and we all need saving from one thing or another. Everyone has a cross to bear, mine is anger yours is homosexuality.”
Chuck responded cautiously, “Since I was young all I heard is how awful homosexuality is from the Church.”
Stave with a sad expression asked, “Is it worse than killing another man in anger?” Stave continued without a response, “Ten years ago there were three gang bangers harassing my street. One day with bats, they were pummeling anyone one on the street. I saw them and in a fit of rage, I took the bat off one and cracked his skull with one mighty blow. I chased the other two off our block. When I returned to the one I fell, he was in convulsions. Before the paramedics could arrive, he stopped breathing. The police said it was self-defense, but I knew the rage in my heart. I still see the results of my madness as it plays itself out in my dreams.”
After breath-taking moment Stave added, “I will warn you on one thing, if you give your heart to God, be prepared to choose between your sins and God. If you think the guilt trip man lays on you is bad, wait until the love of God floods your being.”
Chuck appeared the next Sunday and met me after service. Chuck met with Stave and me many times over the next four weeks. It was at one of those meeting Chuck said he was looking for this great conversion, aha moment. Instead, he just came realized what is means to be a child of God.
It was later that day when problems surrounding Chuck came to the surface. Word had gotten out into the congregation we had a homosexual attending services. I called the one party involved and tried to explain the situation to them. I thought that would settle it, but I thought wrong. It all boiled over this past week and we had an impromptu meeting today regarding this heresy. I invited Stave, a member in good standing with the Church and friend to Chuck. There were several complaints lodged about having a homosexual in the church every week. They ranged from not having the expertise in dealing with homosexuality to the affect on the children. It was two hours of heated discussion about what to do about the “gay” in the church. Understanding their apprehension, I was starting to agree with it.
Stave remained quiet the whole time until someone made a motion to ask Chuck to find a different Church. I asked for objections and Stave spoke out, “John 5, about two months ago we listened to a sermon on John 5. The pastor pointed out that the people around the miracle were so wrapped up in their own rules; they could not see the miracle in front of them. It is a story about a man who was hurting and Jesus healed him from his affliction and instead of everyone amazed by the miracle, they were angered because Jesus saved the man out of order and it was on the Sabbath.
2000 years later, Jesus saves a homosexual atheist and this church cannot see the miracle because they have rules against gays in their church. You could point out to your children the miracle that took place but instead you have chosen to point out the homosexual among you. Between God’s miraculous healing and sinner amongst sinners, you chose to point out the sinner and ignore God’s miracle. What is the affect on your kids of not seeing God’s miracle?
You could have asked Chuck to your house, break bread with him, and then you would have the expertise to deal with him, but instead you have chosen to shun him. Chuck is that man on the mat who could not get down to the water. Jesus came into his life and saving him from his sin, just as Jesus saved all of you and me. Instead of cheering for this miracle, this church is choosing to throw a new Christian out into the cold because he doesn’t fit into your rules of church going Christian.”
I instantly remembered this sermon. I remembered on two accounts. One being I was so proud of the thoughts in it and secondly because it was the very day Chuck paraded into our lives. The elder who made the motion withdrew it. There were a few lingering objections but we were all convicted by our own sin and believe in God. Several who complained about Chuck’s presence in the Church vowed to invite him over for dinner to break bread with him. The people, who raised questions as to the affect on their children, knew what to tell them and agreed to invite him into membership of this Church.
I met with Stave after the meeting and asked why he befriended and championed Chuck. Stave explained before he knew God he would beat the “fags” because it was against the Bible. It was easy to bait them into a fight and even easier to hurt them. He said, “The irony is I was a non-Christian claiming the Bible to violate the Bible on a person no worse than me.” Stave mentioned it was a way to correct the wrong.
“Thank you for bringing me back to Gospel.” I explained, “It is humbling to hear the words I preached throwing back at me when I need it.”
Stave explained to me he was humbled by his own speech. He said, “I chastised everyone in the room for not believing in miracles, when I myself do not believe in them. God saved me, He forgave me and I was still living as a condemned man. I refused to become an Elder or Deacon because of my past sins, even though they had been forgiven. I did not believe the miracle God gave me so I turned down offers to help others. I too put my rules before God’s miracles and rejected my own saving grace. If the offer for me to become an Elder is still open this year, I will accept it. I do believe God and God put that believe to the test this very day. As I spouted off about disbelieve of others, and then God press those very same words on me.”
I drove home this evening trying not to sob being twice humbled by this angry sinful man. It is not every day God humbles me by the acts of another through the words I preach. I am sure that tomorrow I will feel free but today I feel ashamed of my actions and disbelief in God. I preach good words and today it took an angry sinful man to show me what those words mean. There is not a day goes by I am not professing my faith in God. Then there are days like today where God shows me how much he loves me by the people He puts in my life. God id good.
There is no such thing as "gay" or "Bi-sexual" or "Transgender". It's all a misguided identity from one's parents. I am saddened about the Transgender people today, they are so messed up in their heads that they think deciding on their own gender is the biggest thing in this world for them to accomplish. It's really pathetic!
It was good of the church to give Chuck the guidance he needed. I hope he was not being encouraged to think that it was okay for him to be gay.
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