"All great changes in this universe can be seen as cyclical and preceded by chaos."
Michael Dixon
Dearest Friends~
Karma sure chewed my ass today and I have no idea why!
It was supposed to be so easy. Friend Debbi drives me to Broadway Towers by 11:00a. We get there at 10:30a. However.....before we get there, just as we get into town, I get a phone call from the Housing Authority to let me know there was a problem. Seems that I was a section 8 recipient (which I was well aware of). Broadway Towers is strictly rent dependent upon income. The programs are separate and cannot concur. That means, if I didn't surrender my section 8 voucher TODAY then I couldn't take possession of the apartment. So, then I had to deal with the lease on the trailer and the part that said I had to give 30 day's notice of intent to vacate. When I called the property manager, they reiterated the requirement. So, then I had to explain my situation. I had to cancel my section 8 voucher and take possession of the apartment today or lose it. If I gave my 30 day notice I couldn't surrender the voucher and probably wouldn't have an apartment at the end of those 30 days.
After much humming and hawing they agreed to release me from the lease but I still have to pay rent for September in lieu of the 30 day's notice. So, then it went back to the housing authority to get it all straight in the computer. This was at 11:50a. Debbi had an appointment at 12:30p and was getting pretty irritated. I felt terrible. I was already stressed to the max and worrying about her being upset was just making things worse. To make things even more magical, my sugar was dropping. Debbi, bless her heart, bought me a hamburger.
Once everything was finally in order it was after 12:30p. They gave us a whirlwind tour of the facility and the apartment. Honestly, I was horrified by how DINKY the damn thing is! They say it's 600 square feet. More like 300 feet. The only other impressions I was given time to gather were that there is more closet space in that tiny apartment than there is in my trailer and that the kitchen IS one of the closets!
I begged Brother Jason to take me back sometime this week so I could take my time and get my bearings and figure out what I can fit and what I can't. Packing up has been painful enough. It's about to get even more so.
Anyway, when I got home I went into complete meltdown. I haven't cried that hard in a long, long time. I was convinced I'd just made the worst mistake of my life, and frankly I'm still not certain I haven't. But after taking some time, resting, and doing a lot of talking with Misti (who has some personal insight into what I'm going through), I finally started emerging. I still hurt. I'm emotionally exhausted. But at least the creative juices have started to flow. I'm thinking of ways I can make the apartment "habitable" without breaking too much more of my heart. But I really need to go back and walk through it again...slowly.
Tonight I'm feeling resigned and have even started gathering up little stuff that I'd meant to donate anyway and get them out of the way. I'm taking all of my books with me (damn them!) but I'm going to sort back through the other stuff. Though there's a voice in my head saying "Don't look back!"
Truthfully, I'm grateful that I will have a place to live. Despite its small size there are a lot of pluses to living there. And everyone will finally shut the hell up about my living way out here where I'm so inconvenient. Now they'll come up with new excuses not to help me, I'm sure.
So, I move into senior living on Sunday and say good-bye to my home of 11 years.
Maybe karma was finally paid in full for whatever I did in a past life to piss it off.
I know you will miss "out there." I have lived in a trailer and found it to be very close to nature. And you reminded me of the time when I was alone in this huge house with no furniture and thought about moving into a high-rise until I saw the size and storage space in an expensive one bedroom apartment with a very high monthly maintenance fee. Not for me.
And the idea of moving into elderly living becomes less attractive as I age. But I think that you will benefit from all of the elderly people you will meet in the gathering places in the facility. They may become more helpful than all of your local friends ever were.
A humorous look at the world and life through my eyes.
Follow the author and his wife, as they travel the world …. several times over.
Laugh at their funny stories, self-inflicted crazy events, strange observations, wacky zoo facts and snippets
The Wholly Book of Doo-Doo-Rot-on-Me is adult satirical humor featuring adult language and adult content, and the work is a parody of the Old Testament Book of Deuteronomy.
