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Kenneth W Malcom

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Smashwords
Barnes & Noble
Smashwords

Category:  Arts/Entertainment
ISBN-10:  0011841702

Pages: 138

Copyright: 
Nov 1, 2010
ISBN-13: 2940011841705


Movies in Haiku takes almost 400 movies and breaks them down in the style of Japanese haiku.

You've seen the two hour movie...now get the full movie experience in seventeen syllables! Almost 400 movies done in Japanese haiku! Several genres are covered including comedy, western, sci-fi, classic, and even the worst movies ever made! You'll laugh...you'll cry...you'll wonder where this book has been all your life!



Excerpt

Where did we get the idea for putting movies to Haiku? It’s a long story but we can sum it up here. The two of us were new employees of a global chemical manufacturer. Upon our hiring we were sent to a local junior college for training. This training entailed LOTS of classroom time. Fortunately we had laptops with Internet access.

I had just walked back in from a break and found James on the computer giggling like a little girl. “What’s up?” I asked him. He showed me what he had found: the haiku section of Craigslist, and some of the stuff on there was pretty humorous. Not humorous funny, but humorous bad…REALLY bad! So, naturally, we figured this was right up our alley and decided to give it a whirl. We wrote a couple of O.K. (bad) poems, and then Ken tossed out this gem:


I had a hamster
It died on a Monday night
Toilet clogged to hell

OK, so it’s not exactly “Ivy League” prose, but we thought it was funny, as did many of our colleagues. After fiddling around with it for awhile it hit me: we could write haiku poetry using movies. The challenge of compressing a two-hour film into three lines and seventeen syllables was alluring, to say the least. We tried a few to see if it would work and were pleased by the results. We then decided to see how many we could do without losing our minds. As it turns out we can do quite a few. At this point we decided to put the book together and, lucky for you, dear reader, here we are!


CLOVERFIELD (2008)

Monster takes New York
Is this Godzilla again?
Nope, space invader

MARCH OF THE PENGUINS (2005)

Animal Planet
Could have shown this penguin march
In half-an-hour

CROUCHING TIGER, HIDDEN DRAGON (2000)

Pilfered magic sword
And rejected love make for
Chinese serial

JERRY MAGUIRE (1996)

Cutthroat sports agent
Endures attack of conscience
“Show me the money!”

PET SEMETARY (1989)

Cursed burial grounds
Reanimate dead people
Who are most bummed out

STRIPES (1981)

Slackers join Army
Invade Soviet-held Czechs
In kick-ass R.V.


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