Category: Humor Publisher: Stone Creek Press
Pages: 106
Copyright: Mar 20, 2014
Price: $2.99 (eBook)
Welcome to the Land of Not Ordinary
Hailed as the next Erma Bombeck, the author takes you along on a humorous journey through the un-normal-ness of her most ordinary life. The cast of characters includes dogs, cows, tree frogs, husbands and boys, bunnies and birds and spaghetti and zucchini.If it happens, it's a story!
Vol 2 of the Dancing Skeletons series
Excerpt
SHELVING SHENANIGANS
I was lost in my own world once again and the beat of the music was carrying me off into a space that it is all my own. Without even thinking, I approached the shelves and began straightening them. I pushed some of the books up straight. I listened to the beat of the music and the hum of my heart and the tinkling of my thoughts. I am my own entertainment system, have I ever mentioned that?
I even turned a few books face out. I really wasn’t doing it deliberately as it has become almost second nature when I see a shelf that looks the way this way does. My mind was on a couple of stories that I wanted to write and I pulled a couple of more books nice and straight.
Ah, yes. A nice, tight shelf; just the way they like it. I then moved to the next shelf down and started arranging again. Here’s a new song coming on – this is quite a powerful group of music playing this time. I can definitely handle these tunes. My mind drifted to a few bills that need to be paid as I pushed the books flush against the back. I stand the rest of them up and push tightly to the right. Here’s another place that I can turn one face out.
This really isn’t bad work, I thought to myself. I get to study all these great titles as I straighten things up. I patted all the books to make sure everything was nice and square and standing straight up. I moved again inside my own head, listening to the beat of the music. I wonder if Jason is home yet, my mind drifted again. He’s been working so hard and gone so much. And I started on the next shelf down. This one is really bad as some of them are actually double stacked. The music shifted again and so did my thoughts.
I think the lawn needs mowing again. It’s hard to believe it even managed to grow without any rain. And I pushed books up and over to one side, again making them nice and tight. There were a couple that I turned face out. Yes, I agree that doing that does make a much more attractive display, I half mumbled to myself. I prepare to move on to the bottom shelf. I know that I can’t go home until they are all done.
Home. That would be nice…
WAIT A MINUTE!
I AM HOME!
O MY GAWD – my home bookshelves now look just like those at Barnes and Noble! And Jeff chose that exact moment to enter my world. He started to say something but his eyes were drawn to the bookcase in front of me. He did a double take as he looked again.
And that’s when he started screaming.
Professional Reviews
Very Funny
I laughed so hard at these stories. The author really has a knack for making even the smallest of things very funny. Jon Shellen
Stories Worth Wiping Your A** With
Whether you're making a deposit at the stank bank, dropping a return at the squat shop, or conducting a brown business meeting, these perfectly timed tales provide the literary fragrance your privacy deserves. F
