“After working in the Geriatric Field for over 15 years I thought I knew just about everything to help caregivers and seniors find resources to help them. Then, Along Came Grandpa. Caring for him gave me such a new perspective. Although I had years of professional experience, until I walked in the shoes of a caregiver, I didn’t really know how to help others. This book not only shares my story, the good, bad and ugly, it also gives helpful tips after each chapter to assist caregivers along their journey caring for an older adult.”
I have found that there are several reasons for my journey as caregiver. First and foremost, I think that my educational and career journeys were specifi cally designed to lead me to care for Grandpa. Although I wasn’t even close to being perfect, I was lucky enough to have access to the right people and resources to help me. I think that I needed to learn what it means to care for someone who is elderly—talking about it and doing it are two very different things. I had to experience what it means to see someone you love struggle with an aging body, and how to get them the care they need. I had to learn how to utilize the resources I am always sharing with other caregivers. You can have all of the resources in the world, but if you don’t know how to apply them, they are useless. My experience with Grandpa has really changed my entire perspective on the role of a caregiver. I had to experience how overwhelming it is to try to meet the needs of an older adult who needs more care. I had to live through the times when I just wanted to curl up in a fetal position and pray to God that someone would magically take over and help Grandpa. I have to say that being a caregiver has humbled me and made me realize that I may have misjudged other caregivers I have met through my work in the geriatric field, thinking, why don’t they do this or that. I really had no idea what they were going through when I gave advice to these family members trying to find out how they could get help for their loved ones. On an educational and career level, I sounded very authoritative in my advice. I am sure that some of those people I spoke to went home and felt even guiltier because they didn’t know how to help, or even cursed me for making them feel overwhelmed by all that they still needed to or hadn’t even thought of doing for their loved one. I also feel that this journey was exactly what I needed to write this book. If I had written it before my time caring for Grandpa, I would have written a more candy-coated book of what everyone should do to care for their loved one, one of those self-help books that make you feel even more inferior than you did before you sought the help.
A book-length psychodynamic study of pathological narcissism, relationships
with abusive narcissists, and the Narcissistic Personality Disorder, using a new vocabulary.
