Chapter Two

There is nothing sexier on a Friday night then being out with a couple of my girlfriends. Each of us wearing a “come hither,” type flattering dress with high heels.  Our make-up and hair is done to perfection, making those who get paid to model for a living look on with envy.  My perfume was so expensive I had to take a small loan out at the bank just to pay for the damn thing, but it was worth it. We try to do this frequently, but demanding relationships, family commitments and very busy work schedules make us appreciate this fleeting moment we have together.  Kool and the Gang’s signature song, “Ladies Night” wasn’t written for us, but it might as well had been.

As our driver was opening the door of our taxi, we exited one by one in a slow motion yet graceful fashion.  That description has less to do with my desire to be visually creative while telling this story and more to do with the cocktails we had at my place before we began this evening of truth and discovery.

I must in my best Quentin Tarintino-esq imitation take you back a few hours before, when cocktails ranging from my home made bailey’s on the rocks to the watermelon martinis I am known for were flowing like lava from an erupting volcano.  I’m never one to send my girls out on an empty stomach for nothing is less, lady like then stumbling around intoxicated because one didn’t feed themselves.

Since we had decided to wear dresses so tight, that they looked like they were painted on. It was important that whatever I prepared for us to snack was light enough to coat our stomachs without giving us that bloated, “ I wonder if she’s pregnant look.”

With not a lot of time to spare, for gossiping was at the top of our list, I decided to make Tuna rice-paper wraps.  Not only is it very healthy but it was the kind of appetizer that I could create and still be shocked by the sex-capades of some of my freakier girlfriends.

Thank God for the watermelon martinis, for if made correctly it’s like drinking “truth serum.”  The things we shared that evening are the types of secrets that can make a woman go to church and beg for forgiveness!  I by no means considered myself to be a prude, but lets just say, I’ll never be able to look at a cucumber the same way again.

Dressed to impress and slightly drunk as a skunk.  We were giggling like a group of schoolgirls who just admitted they had a crush on the pimpled face boy that set next to them in class.  Upon our arrival at the club we noticed that all eyes were on us.  Not wanting to go with the standard breath mint to camouflage our earlier drinking, I gave each of us a tiny piece of Belgian Chocolate.  It’s a nice way to soothe the palate and a good tool to use when deciding if a man is a “keeper” or not.  Continue that thought in mind for I will be referring to it later in this chapter.

We were barely in the door when it started to feel like we were a bunch a gazelles who wondered into the lion’s den.  Sticking close together for we knew there was safety in numbers, we made our way through tonight’s selection of men.   One by one they spoke, some tall, some short, some with hair, some without. Some young and some receiving social security benefits!

Each of us has a slightly different appreciation for what they desire. Some friends say it’s a man’s shoes. Some say it’s the watch he wears. But for me it’s the drink he holds in his hand.  At that exact moment from across the room I made eye contact with a man I thought was so hot I was willing to give him my virginity……that’s if I still had it to give!

Many times women have been warned that excessive drinking and strobe lights isn’t the smartest combination when picking a suitor. From afar he appeared to be a keeper.  I kept hoping that his drink of choice would win me over. Call me shallow if you like, but I feel that what one drink’s helps defines who they are. Sadly I was correct.

There was Bobby Jackson, a tall drink of water standing before us with a can of red bull in each hand. His shirt unbuttons to far down for a man that had more of a keg physique then a six-pack.  I’m not superficial so I tried giving him the benefit of the doubt by offering him my last piece of my Belgian Chocolate.  He looked at me as if I had shot his pet hamster. To think I actually thought of taking him home and having my way with him; but not appreciating expensive candy was the final straw. Sadly the only BJ he got that night was his initials………………

CHAPTER RECIPES:

Tuna Rice-Paper Wraps

TIME: 10 min to prep / 10 min to fix

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Baileys

1 2/3 cups Irish Whiskey

1 can (14 oz) condensed milk

1 cup of  light cream

1 tsp instant coffee

1 tsp pure vanilla extract

1 tsp almond extract

2 tsp chocolate syrup

Mix all ingredients in a blender put into a nice bottle and chill for 24 hours before serving.

Serving Ideas : Shake well before serving. NOTES : Liqueur will keep for 2 months if refrigerated.

(Approximate time 15 minutes)

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Fresh Watermelon Martini

4 oz cup Grey Goose Citron (or your favorite citrus vodka)

4 oz of midori melon licqueur

5 cups of fresh cut watermelon (cut rind off and remove seeds)

2 oz fresh lemon juice

6 oz watermelon juice

For fun get some red colored sugar to rim the martini glass

Take the 5 cups of watermelon and puree in the blender, place in the freezer for about 20 minutes until nice and icy.

In a pitcher combine the watermelon puree with the remaining ingredients and stir well, pour into your sugar rim martini glasses and garnish with a slice of watermelon.

4 FULL SERVINGS