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Thomas J. Firth

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Member Since: Jan, 2006

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Books by Thomas J. Firth: sort alphabetically, sort by date
A Perplexing Addiction
 Paperback 

More hilarious outdoor misadventures with the mule annoyer. From a wild ride down the Owens River in a run-a-way lawnchair to a surprise accident at the 5th grade school play. From a '48 DeSoto to a cursed e-mail sent by his ex-wife, join Tom, his abiding wife, Cathy, and all of Tom's colorful characters in A Perplexing Addiction.

BR>FONT face="Comic Sans MS" color=#cc6600 size=4>"Now you might not think this odd number of misaligned chromies would be that big of a deal; after all, we humans have been putting up with street mimes, enviro-meddlers, and the Hollywood crowd for years now, and still we are able to muddle along somehow. But the fact is, it's this odd number of chromosomes that cause the mule to be naturaly sterile and unable to produce. If only this were the case with some individuals I know. Anyway, my affliction with mules began early in life. It was at the tender age of about eight or nine I believe whe
I Should've Been A Cowboy

"Thomas Firth's brilliant idea make for very colorful taless...When it comes to the art of exaggeration, Thomas J. Firth could put any self-respecting mule trader to shame" Brenda Brinkley - Western Mule Magazine

span style="font-size: medium;">span style="font-family: 'Comic Sans MS';"> I Should've Been A Cowboy covers such thoughtful subjects ranging from getting older, to that quick, little shortcut on a path less-taken.  From the old muleskinner, Lecil Hadley's evening in the hoosekow and his attempt at ordering in pizza, to a leisurely bicycle ride down a quint, mountain trail.  Tom also covers the disease all mule owners fear; SMDS, and he laments wistfully about his calling in life and what should have been.  Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, Thomas Firth
The Horse Whistler
 Paperback 

Ever been atop a runaway mule in a round pen, encountered the Beast in Waders, or come face to face with a bigfoot? If you've ever camped out, hunted, fished, packed with mules, or spent time around livestock, this collection of outdoor humor stories is sure to tickle your funny bone. A delight for even the most armchair bound urbanite.

P align=left>FONT face="Comic Sans MS" color=#ff6600 size=4>"I cannot wander about being wise and brilliant all of the time, it certainly isn't expected of me. However, I have discovered an ingenious system for being discovered should I become lost. Here's how it works.The moment you discover you are lost, simply remain calm and don't panic. Just sit down and remove your pocket knife from your pocket and begin to sharpen it. Within minutes, some know-it-all will come along and inform you that you are incorrectly sharpening your knife." /FONT>BR> P align=left>U>FONT face="Comic Sans

A Reader's Guide to Author's Jargon and Other Ravings from the Blogosp by Edward Patterson

A Collection of Daily Quotes, a glossary of author terms, a Drag Queens Advice Column and other tidbits, all wrapped up in one enjoyable volume  
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What You Should Know About B.A.N.F.F. by RickthePoetWarrior

Light-headed prose about "living in a postcard” residents and their mountainous egos.  
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