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Joe Herzanek

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Meanest Mom takes tough love approach.
by Joe Herzanek   
Rated "G" by the Author.
     
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Many of you may have seen the story in the news recently. Apparently a mother bought her nineteen-year-old son a car. The story says that she asked only two things of her son as part of the deal. The son was told to not drink and drive, and to keep the car locked when he was not using it.

"Meanest Mom"
takes tough love approach.

Meanest Mom

Jane Hambleton, with son Steven, appear
on "Good Morning America," where she
talked about selling his car after
finding booze under the front seat.


Sooner or later

everyone sits down
to a banquet
of consequences.

-Robert Louis Stevenson



Many of you may have seen the story in the news recently. Apparently a mother bought her nineteen-year-old son a car. The story says that she asked only two things of her son as part of the deal. The son was told to not drink and drive, and to keep the car locked when he was not using it.

Three weeks later, Mom finds a bottle of liquor under the front seat and promptly puts an ad in the paper to sell the car.


"OLDS 1999 Intrigue. Totally uncool parents who obviously don't love teenage son, selling his car. Only driven for three weeks before snoopy mom who needs to get a life found booze under front seat. $3,700/offer. Call meanest mom on the planet."

I would assume that the son was shocked by what she did. I have raised three children myself and went through that challenging phase with each one. Adolescence!

Did Mom do the right thing? Did she overreact? Should she have been snooping around in "his" car?

What I would like to say to this Mom is BRAVO! How many of us, myself included, have made agreements with our teens and then not followed through? First of all, Mom did not overreact. She simply acted on her son's disregard for her previously stated and agreed-upon rules.

If any parent has reason to suspect that their teen is drinking or using drugs, they should "snoop". This goes for "their" bedroom, bathroom, or backpack as well.

Let's keep things in perspective here--the car was "their" car, not "his" car. Mom probably helped with the insurance as well as the purchase. Parents or guardians are liable for consequences of their adolescent's behavior and often for their children's bad choices as they go through this difficult stage of life.

Regarding this particular story, none of us know the whole story, or "the rest of the story" or how this will all play out in the long run. But one thing is certain. People's choices have consequences. Sooner or later we all learn from the choices and decisions we make.

I hope that her son not only benefited from this incident, but that he is in the process of regaining his mother's trust. Fortunately, this mom didn't cave into his pleading to not sell the car.

I'm glad that she did not rob him of this very valuable learning experience.




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EmJ3bYZaQWY

* Have you “tried everything?” Learn about affordable phone counseling for family members dealing with addiction.

MORE ASK JOE:
> Is a relapse—failure?

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>Chronic Pain Management & Pain Pill Addiction: What to do?

>How can I know if my addicted friend or loved one is telling the truth?

>”I need help because I’m not able to deal with my live-in Fiance’s need to get drunk every night.”

>Should my husband “back off?”

>Gambling vs. Drug Addiction? What is your opinion?

>How can I tell if someone is an addict/alcoholic or just a heavy user?

>What is Methadone? What is Harm Reduction?

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