A middle-aged actress walks into a Hollywood casting office. She sits down in front of the desk of a young man. "Tell me something about yourself," he says.
The actress reaches into her large purse, pulls out an Academy Award statue and puts it on the desk in front of the man. "You go first," Shelley Winters says.
Shelley won Best Supporting Actress for Diary of Anne Frank & A Patch of Blue. Nominated Best Actress for A Place in the Sun and Best Supporting Actress for The Poseidon Adventure. She appeared in 162 movies.
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A middle-aged actor is asked many questions by a young casting director. The actor answers them. Finally, the director asks, "Can you do a Southern accent?"
I won Best Actor with a Southern accent for In the Heat of the Night," Rod Steiger said.
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After being a stunt double for top stars, and being stunt coordinator on 103 big movies such as: The Longest Yard, Little Big Man, and Chinatown, Hal Needham walked into a young movie executive's office.
"Hello," the executive greeted. "Nice to meet you."
"Nice to meet you, too."
"Did you bring a resume?"
Needham turned and walked out of the office.
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"I'd like to become a member of your golf course," Victor Mature told the manager.
"Oh, I'm sorry, sir. But we don't take actors."
"I'm no actor," Mature said. "And I've got 53 movies to prove it."
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Forbidden Power won a gold statue of Michelangelo's David for Best Screenplay at the Florence, Italy Film Festival.
However, I don't have Shelley Winters' confidence to set it on an executive's desk.