To Do Or Not To Do?
by Odin Roark

To do or not to do?
That is the question
He asks each and every slow day

And

He is slow
One-finger typing
Today’s beginning
Anticipating
Today’s ending

In between

He will stroke his cat
Gaze out the window at passing cars
Occasionally caress the faded photo
His beloved past
Forever vibrant

Sometimes

He listens to Debussy
The turntable periodically pausing
Reminding him slowing down
Doesn’t mean the end

By mid afternoon

His book is open
Another page to edit
Perhaps two

Then

He pauses
Does nothing
Minutes pass
Sometimes
Hours

He dwells on early day attempts
When sun’s first rays are so promising
Trying to get things done
You know
Things that others tell him
Need doing

Late afternoon appears

He often takes a slow walk
The institution’s grounds are friendly
Tree and bush greet him
Offering as usual
Peace
No demands

The leafy details move gently
Some lose their grip
Fall to the ground
Some days so many sadly fall

He often considers gathering them
Transporting them back to his room
Dying alone seems…

Another day closes down
Sun finds sky’s end
His one-finger typing
Finds little to say some days

Years pass slowly
Like his one-finger typing each night

But

He is thankful
Knowing continued life
Offers so much not to do
Leaving him the time
Not to do it in