Casting About
by Odin Roark

Self-esteem requires self-love to thrive.

Some emotions refuse to yield.

Nights prey on worry laying awake,
staring at the ceiling,
anxious like a fisherman in the night
hurling lines into the dark,
fear for hooks,
worthlessness for lure.

Over head swirls dread’s pitch black,
making blind the focus on attainment,
while desperation trolls the deep,
often pulling up the gnawed-on
and oft fully stripped hook of unworthiness,
but never the catch.

Into the night anxiety continues its casting,
hoping to bait acceptance,
love and fortune
into a satiating reward.

But…

Like most nights,
exhaustion finally lulls desperation
into a rem sleep until eyes suddenly open again,
revealing the same ceiling,
its faithful audience of fly and spider,
remaining as usual, mesmerized,
shaking their survivalist heads
at such a frightened species.