The red earth around me had the sweet aroma of rain. This scent always managed to cheer me up and bring wonderful dreams in my mind but not today. I felt so weak and hopeless as i stared at the flowers and the cross nearby. I missed her horribly.I couldn't help but keep wondering why she had left us so seemingly soon. She had suffered in poverty all her life trying to raise us up. Now when it was our turn to take care of her,she had vanished into the world of the unknown-that place of no return. Huge tears dropped from my eyes and a warm feeling engulfed me almost suddenly. It was as if she was there in spirit for in my heart i heard her unmistakably reassuring voice telling me to stop crying because everything was fine. That motherly voice went on to tell me to cherish all the moments we shared together and to be thankful.

Strangely,from that moment i found myself smiling for the first time in a long time. Memories commenced pouring in my mind and i sat there for hours lost in thought.

I remembered when I was four years old,i started noticing what was going on around me. I couldn't remember anything that happened in my life before then. I used to play a lot with my sister,cousins and even other neighboring children. There is this particular day that I will never forget. It was when mum told me that I was to begin going to nursery school the following day. I felt excited and scared at the same time. Mum read my worried mind and assured me that everything would be fine. I felt relaxed again for I trusted mummy.

I began nursery school. It was built on a hilly place. There were two nursery school teachers. One was very soft-spoken and nice whereas the other was a bit too harsh. Mummy always escorted me to nursery school and picked me up every Monday to Friday at noon-time. Mummy was strongly build and quite more on the plump side. Her face was kind and motherly. I felt that she was the best mum in the whole world. I enjoyed going to nursery every day because I was very eager to learn new songs,numbers and letters . I loved dancing in the singing games and enjoyed it more when it was on a parents day and everybody was watching including mum.

It had rained all night. Streams of water were flowing in various places. Big streams,small streams and even teeny weeny ones. I had always been scared of flowing water since the day I saw my maternal aunt almost being swept away by a fast flowing river. I did not want to go outside but I had to. Today was the day I was to commence my primary one. I was only five. I clang to my mum whenever we were about to cross any stream- even a teeny weeny one. Mummy lovingly assured me that I was not going to be swept away.

I missed my mum terribly when she left me with strangers in my new school. I remember I cried most of the day and some kids made fun of me by calling me a 'cry baby.' I was actually bullied in primary one because I was among the smallest kids- if not the youngest. My class-teacher however loved me because she was a friend mum's. She wouldn't punish me when she was punishing the rest of the class for noise making. She considered me rather quite and thought I was unable to make noise in class. There was always my sweet mother to go home to after an unpleasant day at school. That was one fact that kept me strong and going.

There was this particular day when mum and I had gone to visit my maternal uncle- one of her brothers. He had so many cattle. I had always been afraid of cows and bulls because i thought they were big and scary. For this reason,i never liked going to uncle Fred's house. As always,mum assured me that everything was going to be fine. I followed her closely behind. As we entered uncle Fred's house, a huge black hued angry bull came rushing straight to mummy. He looked rather angry and was such a dreadful sight. I scream with all my might and was shaking like a leaf on a windy day. I didn't want mummy to be hurt. Uncle Fred came rushing out of his house and managed to chase the bull away just in the nick of time.

I remembered of my journey throughout primary school and secondary schools. Mum was there everytime and encouraged me to do well in my academics. She didn't have much education but what mesmerised me most about her was the fact that she was very enthusiastic about all educational matters. She had lived during an era which greatly be-littled the girl child education. During mum's youth,girls were married off prematurely mostly to men they never loved-and never grew to love.

I remembered how i fell sick during my primary seven. Mum could carry me on her back taking me from one hospital to another because i was too weak to walk. Tears started welling in my eyes at the memory of this. Mum had been a prayer warrior and she could pray ceaselessly for hours every night and every morning. She was a loving woman who had shown love and affection to everyone she came across even the mad men in the village who she ceaselessly fed with every little food she had. As a result,she was loved by almost everybody young,old,poor,rich, mad and normal.

I remembered mum on her sick bed,she had become a weakling. The once energetic, happy and plumb woman had become the complete opposite- though she still retained her happy nature. My heart would break into a million pieces everyday i saw her lying there helpless. I wanted her to get well. I wanted things to go back to the former norm but they just didn't. Mummy became feeble as days went by.

It had been raining the whole night and day. The sun was setting and the atmosphere was filled with the songs of croaking frogs and chirping crickets. I was lying in bed unable to move with an upset tummy. Mummy woke up from her sick bed feebly and made me some porridge but i couldn't eat. She grabbed her coat and walked out in the heavy rain weakly. I called her to come back inside the house but she just told me that she would be right back. She walked in the heavy rain to the nearby chemist which was about 2km away just to get me medicine. This act touched me so much and i couldn't stop crying. It was an act of selfless love. The love of a mother for a child which is so great.

As i sat by her graveside, i realised that mum would want me to live my life happily and love others selflessly. I bid mummy a sad goodbye but deep in my heart,i felt she was in a better place!