AuthorsDen.com  Join | Login 

 
Where Authors and Readers come together!

Authors | Books | Audiobooks | eBooks | Signed Bookstore | Stories | Articles | Poetry | Blogs | News | Events | Reviews | Videos | Success | Gold Members | Testimonials

Featured Authors:  Tichaona Chinyelu, iLisa DAnnolfo Levey, iLisa Loucks Christenson, iKalikiano Kalei, iGracie McKeever, iMr. Ed, iTracey Morait, iFlo Fitzpatrick, iRobin Ouzman Hislop, iLalita Vasu, i

  Home > Relationships > Articles
Popular: Books, Stories, Articles, Poetry      Authors: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z     

Sam Vaknin

 Follow Me  

· 477 titles
· 125 Reviews
· Share with Friends!
· Save to My Library
·
Member Since: Jul, 2000

   Sitemap
   Contact Author
   Message Board
   Read Reviews



Books
· FREE The Narcissist on Instagram: Epigrams and Observations - Sixth Book

· FREE The Narcissist on Instagram: Epigrams and Observations - Sixth Book

· The Narcissist on Instagram: Epigrams and Observations - Fifth Book

· Poetry of Healing and Abuse

· World in Conflict, Mind in Transition: Sam Vaknin Interviews

· FREE The Narcissist on Instagram: Epigrams and Observations - Fourth Book

· FREE The Narcissist on Instagram: Epigrams and Observations - Third Book

· FREE The Narcissist on Instagram: Epigrams and Observations - Second Book

· FREE The Narcissist on Instagram: Epigrams and Observations - First Book

· FREE A Critique of Piketty's Capital in the Twenty-first Century [


Short Stories
· Hunting Bambi

· Ned’s Short Life

· Sexsomnia

· Fugue

· The Galatea of Cotard

· Live Burial

· Lucid Dreams

· A Dream Come True

· Anton's Trap

· The Elephant's Call


Articles
· Triggering Cascade, Trauma Imprinting, and Total Reactance

· Lessons of My Life

· FILM REVIEW The Place (2017)

· Teen Suicide and Social Media

· The Best Offer

· Cryptoassets (such as cryptocurrencies): Pyramid Schemes or Public Goods?

· 2017 Encyclopedia Britannica Ultimate Knowledge Pack

· Narcissists HATE Christmas, Holidays, and Birthdays

· A Cerebral Narcissist on His Sexuality

· Narcissist's Frustrating, Negativistic, and Passive-Aggressive Behaviors


Poetry
· Her Birthday

· Hebrew Love

· My Putrid Lover

· Twinkle Star

· Synthetic Joy

· Our Love Alivid

· The Miracle of the Kisses

· Selfdream

· In Moist Propinquity

· A Hundred Children

         More poetry...
News
· FREE E-BOOK Abuse, Trauma, and Torture - Their Consequences and Effects

· FREE E-BOOK Narcissistic and Psychopathic Leaders

· FREE EBOOK The Hitler File (Excerpts)

· NEW eBOOK Excerpts from the Archives and Case Studies

· EIGHTH EDITION - Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited

· NEW BOOK - After the Rain - How the West Lost the East

· NEW EBOOK Personality Disorders Revisited

Sam Vaknin, click here to update your web pages on AuthorsDen.

Books by
Sam Vaknin











See all Books
by Sam Vaknin


Spite and Envy: Passive-Aggressive Narcissists
by Sam Vaknin
Last edited: Saturday, December 6, 2014
Posted: Saturday, December 6, 2014



     
Passive-aggressiveness wears a multitude of guises: procrastination, malingering, perfectionism, forgetfulness, neglect, truancy, intentional inefficiency, stubbornness, and outright sabotage. This repeated and advertent misconduct has far reaching effects. Consider the Negativist in the workplace: he or she invests time and efforts in obstructing their own chores and in undermining relationships. But, these self-destructive and self-defeating behaviors wreak havoc throughout the workshop or the office.


Negativistic (Passive-Aggressive) Personality Disorder is not yet recognized by the DSM Committee. It makes its appearances in Appendix B of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual, titled "Criteria Sets and Axes Provided for Further Study."

Some people are perennial pessimists and have "negative energy" and negativistic attitudes ("good things don't last", "it doesn't pay to be good", "the future is behind me"). Not only do they disparage the efforts of others, but they make it a point to resist demands to perform in workplace and social settings and to frustrate people's expectations and requests, however reasonable and minimal they may be. Such persons regard every requirement and assigned task as impositions, reject authority, resent authority figures (boss, teacher, parent-like spouse), feel shackled and enslaved by commitment, and oppose relationships that bind them in any manner.


Whether these attitudes and behaviors are acquired/learned or the outcome of heredity is still an open question. Often, passive-aggression is the only weapon of the weak and the meek, besieged as they are by frustration, helplessness, envy and spite, the organizing principles of their emotional landscape and the engines and main motivating forces of their lives.

Passive-aggressiveness wears a multitude of guises: procrastination, malingering, perfectionism, forgetfulness, neglect, truancy, intentional inefficiency, stubbornness, and outright sabotage. This repeated and advertent misconduct has far reaching effects. Consider the Negativist in the workplace: he or she invests time and efforts in obstructing their own chores and in undermining relationships. But, these self-destructive and self-defeating behaviors wreak havoc throughout the workshop or the office.

People diagnosed with the Negativistic (Passive-Aggressive) Personality Disorder resemble narcissists in some important respects. Despite the obstructive role they play, passive-aggressives feel unappreciated, underpaid, cheated, and misunderstood. They chronically complain, whine, carp, and criticize. They blame their failures and defeats on others, posing as martyrs and victims of a corrupt, inefficient, and heartless system (in other words, they have alloplastic defenses and an external locus of control).

Passive-aggressives sulk and give the "silent treatment" in reaction to real or imagined slights. They suffer from ideas of reference (believe that they are the butt of derision, contempt, and condemnation) and are mildly paranoid (the world is out to get them, which explains their personal misfortune). In the words of the DSM: "They may be sullen, irritable, impatient, argumentative, cynical, skeptical and contrary." They are also hostile, explosive, lack impulse control, and, sometimes, reckless.

Inevitably, passive-aggressives are envious of the fortunate, the successful, the famous, their superiors, those in favor, and the happy. They vent this venomous jealousy openly and defiantly whenever given the opportunity. But, deep at heart, passive-aggressives are craven. When reprimanded, they immediately revert to begging forgiveness, kowtowing, maudlin protestations, turning on their charm, and promising to behave and perform better in the future.


Read Notes from the therapy of a Negativistic (Passive-Aggressive) Patient

Passive-aggressive Bureaucracies

Collectives - especially bureaucracies, such as for-profit universities, health maintenance organizations (HMOs), the army, and government - tend to behave passive-aggressively and to frustrate their constituencies. This misconduct is often aimed at releasing tensions and stress that the individuals comprising these organizations accumulate in their daily contact with members of the public.

Additionally, as Kafka astutely observed, such misbehavior fosters dependence in the clients of these establishments and cements a relationship of superior (i.e., the obstructionist group) versus inferior (the demanding and deserving individual, who is reduced to begging and supplicating).

Passive-aggressiveness has a lot in common with pathological narcissism: the destructive envy, the recurrent attempts to buttress grandiose fantasies of omnipotence and omniscience, the lack of impulse control, the deficient ability to empathize, and the sense of entitlement, often incommensurate with its real-life achievements.

No wonder, therefore, that negativistic, narcissistic, and borderline organizations share similar traits and identical psychological defenses: most notably denial (mainly of the existence of problems and complaints), and projection (blaming the group's failures and dysfunction on its clients).

In such a state of mind, it is easy to confuse means (making money, hiring staff, constructing or renting facilities, and so on) with ends (providing loans, educating students, assisting the poor, fighting wars, etc.). Means become ends and ends become means.

Consequently, the original goals of the organization are now considered to be nothing more than obstacles on the way to realizing new aims: borrowers, students, or the poor are nuisances to be summarily dispensed with as the board of directors considers the erection of yet another office tower and the disbursement of yet another annual bonus to its members. As Parkinson noted, the collective perpetuates its existence, regardless of whether it has any role left and how well it functions.


As the constituencies of these collectives - most forcefully, its clients - protest and exert pressure in an attempt to restore them to their erstwhile state, the collectives develop a paranoid state of mind, a siege mentality, replete with persecutory delusions and aggressive behavior. This anxiety is an introjection of guilt. Deep inside, these organizations know that they have strayed from the right path. They anticipate attacks and rebukes and are rendered defensive and suspicious by the inevitable, impending onslaught. 

 

Web Site: Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited


Want to review or comment on this article?


Need a FREE Reader Membership?


New Articles by Sam Vaknin
article Image
The Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Pathological Narcissism - a Primer.
Pathological Narcissism and the Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)
article Image
The psychology and sociology of art, artists, and the creative process.
Art, Artists, and the Creative Process
article Image
Economics affects every aspect of our lives. Hence the importance of studying the ethical, moral, and philosophical question it provokes.
The Philosophy of Economics - Part II
article Image
Economics affects every aspect of our lives. Hence the importance of studying the ethical, moral, and philosophical question it provokes.
The Philosophy of Economics - Part I
article Image
Detailed studies of five terrorist organizations in the Balkan.
Terrorists and Freedom Fighters - Part II
article Image
Detailed studies of five terrorist organizations in the Balkan.
Terrorists and Freedom Fighters - Part I
article Image
The role of women in the post communist countries in transition.
Women in Transition
article Image
Articles about mental health issues and Personality Disorders
Mental Health Articles by Sam Vaknin
article Image
Essays about various topics in current philosophy. <br>
Philosophy Articles by Sam Vaknin - Part I
article Image
These seven movies deal with moral and ethical dilemmas. "The Matrix" - with the nature of reality, "Titanic" - tackles the moral obligation versus se
Moral Deliberations in Films
article Image
Diplomats and Non Government Organizations (NGOs) thrive in trouble spots.
Diplomats and NGOs
article Image
Can religious communities co-existence? A study of the Balkan case.
Religions and Co-Existence
article Image
Language and media play decisive roles in political and economic conflicts.
Language and Media Articles
article Image
Issues in microeconomics and macroeconomics studied through the prism of economies in transition.
Economics Articles - Part II
article Image
Issues in microeconomics and macroeconomics studied through the prism of economies in transition.
Economics Articles - Part I
article Image
Articles and essays regarding the societies, politics, economics, geopolitics and history of countries in Central Eastern Europe and South Eastern Eur
International Affairs Articles - Part II
article Image
Articles and essays regarding the societies, politics, economics, geopolitics and history of countries in Central Eastern Europe and South Eastern Eur
International Affairs Articles - Part I