Look, up in the sky. Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it's another damned probe from our nosy neighbors to the south! Great, now we can't even go outside without winding up on Candid Camera!
What did Mars ever do to you? We've been sitting here for millions of years, minding our own business. Then some new kid moves into the neighborhood and suddenly decides to spy on everyone. He camps out on our front lawn and leaves his toys all over the place-- do you have any idea how much one of those Landers weighs? They've left dents all over the meticulously tended dust gardens of the Zen Martians! And I've yet to hear of any offers of compensation.
And what are you hoping to learn from all of these pictures you've been snapping of our neighborhood? "Mars once had water!" Well, duh! Any fool with two sets of-- sorry, one set of eyes could see that! How many trillions of dollars did you people spend to arrive at that astute conclusion?
Were you expecting some sort of Welcome Wagon to come trundling up to the probes? Have you learned nothing from your own history? Look what happened to the friendly Native Americans who stood on the beaches of North America to welcome the invaders ashore. We won't be making THAT mistake! Search for us all you want; you won't find us.
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Reviewed by Ricky the Love Martian
Reviewed on July 25, 2003
It seemed apropos that I wait until Mars got closer to us to read this one. Sorry I waited soooo long to read it though, Hon!
Funny stuff. ESPECIALLY NOW!
Reviewed by Matthew Wright (Reader)
Reviewed on June 24, 2003
This is the real Martian Chronicle! It's true too - why on Earth (or Mars) would Marsfolk want to come and say hello to primitive primates??
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