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Joseph W. Montaperto

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Member Since: Mar, 2013

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Blogs by Joseph W. Montaperto

THE MAGICAL MEETING
7/20/2020 9:36:39 PM


16 year old Joey Montaperto actually meets the breathtaking Esperanza for the first time!
The time has come...the moment that I have both feared and desperately longed for - for quite some time. She is so beautiful. I’m talking about Esperanza - at the beauty salon Tijeras de Oro in Elizabeth, NJ. I can’t even look at her - she is so breathtaking.
She has finally busted me. I’ve been peering at her through the picture window of the salon for at least two weeks now - trying to jump out of view when she looks my way. I’m 16 years old in 1976. She continues to look my way with a smile and wiggles her finger for me to come in. I want to turn and run. I want to make up some excuse about having to go - yet I yearn to go in there too. Paralyzing conflict knots up my whole body. I feel like I’m the Scarecrow from The Wizard Of Oz. My body is jerking all over the place. My left foot headed away, my right foot headed towards her - what a mess!!

I somehow orchestrate my extremities into making it to the front door, as she opens it up to invite me in. Instantly, it’s like I have crossed the threshold into another dimension. A strange, exotic, secret world. The first thing to rock my senses is the distinctive aroma filling the air. A sultry mix of hairspray, perfume, and cigarette smoke. The powerful hint of alcohol stings my olfactory senses. A feeling of awe and reverence fills my body, making me feel even more lightheaded. There are lights everywhere. Bright bulbs surround the mirrors in front of the barber chairs. Rapid-fire chattering in Spanish, loud tittering, clicking heels, snapping gum and blaring Puerto Rican music congeals into an enchanting, yet insanely intimidating cocktail.
Then I notice everyone in there smiling and laughing with anticipation.
These are women - not girls. They smell differently - each bearing their own particular scent and perfume. I gulp as I look around wide-eyed, trying to force some moisture into my depleted mouth and lips.
“Ay papi, come te llamas?” She asks in a lilting tone.
“What?”
A second of confused silence.
“No hablas Espanol? Papi?”
“Espanol? No...um...I don’t ...speak Spanish….”
“Oh baby - I thought you was Boriqua…”
“What?”
“I thought you was Puerto Rican - no?”
“Where you from, papi?’
“Um….here.... well...I mean, from Brooklyn…”
“Ay - what are you - Italian?”
“Yeah. Sicilian.”


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More Blogs by Joseph W. Montaperto
• SHE LOVES IT!! - Tuesday, July 25, 2023
• A FANTASY? - Friday, June 16, 2023
• OPERATION RESCUE ESPERANZA! - Friday, June 16, 2023
• SADNESS - Friday, June 16, 2023
• THE SCORE - THE SCARE - Thursday, March 2, 2023
• HALLOWEEN - Monday, January 30, 2023
• BACK TO WORK - Sunday, January 8, 2023
• THE SHOWDOWN - Sunday, December 11, 2022
• THE CHEETAH - Sunday, December 11, 2022
• THE IMMACULATE CONCEPTION - Sunday, October 2, 2022
• THE CONSEQUENCES - Thursday, September 8, 2022
• A FINISHED PRODUCT - Sunday, August 7, 2022
• THE ETTA JAMES VIBE - Monday, June 20, 2022
• THE TRIBUTE - Tuesday, May 31, 2022
• IT'S GOING DOWN! - Monday, May 16, 2022
• THE MORNING AFTER - Monday, April 18, 2022
• THE SAVOY - Sunday, March 27, 2022
• THE BIG NIGHT - Tuesday, March 1, 2022
• THE SPEECH - Monday, February 7, 2022
• THE SCHEME - Friday, January 14, 2022
• HOW TIMES HAVE CHANGED! - Thursday, January 6, 2022
• THE PUNISHMENT - Wednesday, December 8, 2021
• THE CHASE - PART 2 - Friday, November 26, 2021
• THE CHASE - Monday, November 8, 2021
• OBSTACLES TO LOVE!! - Friday, October 15, 2021
• THE CALL - Sunday, October 3, 2021
• A SUDDEN PAIN - Tuesday, September 7, 2021
• A DREAM - Tuesday, August 24, 2021
• A BRAVE NEW WORLD - Sunday, August 8, 2021
• THE MAN - Sunday, July 18, 2021
• THREE GUYS - Monday, June 21, 2021
• THE NA-NA SURPRISE! - Sunday, June 6, 2021
• THE END OF AN ERA - Thursday, May 20, 2021
• THE CELEBRATION! - Friday, May 7, 2021
• THE INTERVIEW - Wednesday, April 21, 2021
• THE FAMILY - Thursday, April 8, 2021
• THE FOX HOLE!! - Sunday, March 28, 2021
• JACK THE BARBER IS A DICK!! - Saturday, March 6, 2021
• THE CONFLICT OF JACK'S BARBER SHOP - Saturday, February 13, 2021
• I MUST SAVE ESPERANZA!! - Thursday, January 28, 2021
• WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?! - Wednesday, January 13, 2021
• WHAT HAPPENED?! PART 2 - Wednesday, December 30, 2020
• WHAT HAPPENED?! - Monday, December 14, 2020
• CUMBERLAND FARMS EDUCATION - Saturday, November 21, 2020
• THANK GOD FOR MY MUSTACHE! - Saturday, October 31, 2020
• NA-NA JOHNSON - Saturday, October 17, 2020
• THE SCARE - Tuesday, October 6, 2020
• THE BIG FIGHT - Monday, September 21, 2020
• THE PICNIC PANTS EPISODE - Wednesday, September 9, 2020
• THE KISS - Saturday, August 22, 2020
• THE MOD SHAG AFRO - Tuesday, August 4, 2020
•  THE MAGICAL MEETING - Monday, July 20, 2020  

• THE ERADICATION OF ENORMO - THE HUMAN BUTT - Saturday, June 27, 2020
• ESPERANZA - Tuesday, June 16, 2020
• THE TRIALS OF WEATHERBEE H.PEABODY - Saturday, May 30, 2020
• THE PILGRIM GIRL - Wednesday, May 13, 2020
• THE CALLING - Monday, April 20, 2020
• MORE THRILLS FROM THE 70s! - Tuesday, March 31, 2020
• THE 70s AND NOW - CONTINUED - Wednesday, March 11, 2020
• EXHIBIT B - THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE 70's AND NOW - Wednesday, February 19, 2020
• THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE 70's AND TODAY - Tuesday, January 28, 2020
• PROJECTILE CHILI - Friday, January 17, 2020
• RESTAURANT MANAGERS WHO HAVE TORMENTED ME - Friday, January 17, 2020
• THE LEGEND OF DAVID ROSS - Monday, January 13, 2020
• THE LEGEND OF DUNCAN VALIANT - Monday, January 13, 2020
• IT HAPPENS EVERY CATERING SEASON - Tuesday, January 7, 2020
• A HORRIFIC CATERING EVENT - Tuesday, January 7, 2020
• WHERE ARE MY BUTTER PEOPLE? - Tuesday, January 7, 2020
• LISTS - Tuesday, January 7, 2020
• A MOST UNFORTUNATE PAIRING - Tuesday, January 7, 2020
• LA VENDETTA 2 - A HEARTWARMING CHRISTMAS TALE - Wednesday, December 25, 2019
• LA VENDETTA - Saturday, November 23, 2019
• Nobody Gets Out Of Catering Alive - Friday, November 22, 2019
• Christmas Holiday at our house - Wednesday, December 10, 2014
• The Edge of Whiteness - Friday, November 14, 2014
• The Edge of Whiteness - Friday, October 31, 2014