Blogs by Flo Fitzpatrick
Words
6/16/2026 5:10:32 AM
“Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me.”
We all heard it when we were kids. And even then we knew it was a lie. Words have the power to devastate. To gut us in the center of our being. To fester and eat away at our psyches for years. We knew it then. We know it now.
When I was in college, someone claiming to be my friend decimated me with words. The onslaught consisted of about six sentences and was aimed at my looks, my personality and my talent. They were enough to haunt me at future auditions, during acting, singing, and dance classes, before opening nights…and in the middle of romantic relationships. To this day I still inwardly writhe, when I remember what was said to me. In a way, I think the memory of those words made me a better teacher because no matter the class…acting, dance, even writing, I did my best to only critique technique and NEVER attack the person struggling. I posted about my grievance with the trash company yesterday. I plan to call today. I’ll explain the issue. I will not berate the poor person who has to deal with calls every day or call this person a dunce for trying to solve the problems of disorganization in the company.
I couldn’t help but think about what my so-called friend said decades ago when I watched the clip of the pudgy, hate-filled UFC fighter doing his best to destroy a woman I doubt he’s never met. He wanted to destroy her, not for her ideas on how best to help people in this world, but for what she symbolizes. Michelle Obama is strong and intelligent and beautiful. She’s married to a man with decency and dignity and determination to make the world a better place. She has a list of accomplishments this sad fighter will never come close to achieving. She also happens to be black, and have the distincition of being a racist country’s first black First Lady. And she’s heard it all. Throughout her life. And not let herself be sidetracked by stupidity and hate.
The fighter who dissed Michelle Obama knocked down another man in a tacky, mosquito-filled arena. Wow. That’s this guy’s big claim to fame in a world struggling to survive under the weight of deaths of children thanks to the greed of the wealthy, climate change, wars, people in cages, rising prices, expense of healthcare, ….the list of horrors is endless and continuous.
But he learned what the entire Trump administration and the majority of MAGA cultists discovered early on. Words DO matter. If you can’t be admired or do great things like your enemy, trash them. I’m still in shock, years later, that Trump was given a rousing ovation and anyone with a shred of decency continued to follow him after he mocked the disabled reporter. After his disgusting tirade about women on Access Hollywood.
It used to be that people disagreed, often quite strongly, about policy or “things.” But nowhere in the fight was anyone called Low IQ or fat or stupid. I was looking at the race in Texas where the desperate candidate for the GOP is trying to bring down his opponent by implying his masculinity is in question. He also claimed Talarico is a vegan (he’s not) and as a vegan, I’m still puzzling as to why eating healthy and saving animals and the planet is considered unmanly :) but….back to the point, nowhere in the mix is there a hint of what Talarico plans to do with issues like social security or housing or immigration.
It’s this way across the board. America has become a nation of name-callers from the “top” down. No wonder we’re despised around the world. Diplomacy is a lost art. Ugly people are saying uglier things. (And by ugly, I mean inside, where beauty really counts).
I just keep remembering my Mom telling me, from an early age on, the adage she learned from her mother: “If you can’t say anything nice about someone, don’t say anything at all.”
It’s a good idea to follow.
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