How It Starts

I see her a couple of times per week.

She signs in and out of the building by my work station.

She gets my professional customer service smile.

I am minding my own business.

Her smile lingers longer than she does.

This goes on for months.

I am not giving this any thought.

At some point I somehow catch myself

Looking in her direction

Even if I only see her shoulder around the corner.

If I back up my chair I discover she is looking in my direction-

A reminder to certainly get back to my duties.

It is not on my mind, but if asked…

I would have to give confirmation

That she is growing more beautiful with the passing of time.

An odd curiosity develops.

I still catch myself looking in her direction…

But now it is only after I have been looking at her for some time.

Pondering this quirk my conscious mind now directs me to consider

She is much younger than I am, be professional,

And I sensibly return safely to my duties.

I have no measure of how much time passes after this,

But I don’t catch myself looking in her direction,

I find that we are looking at each other from across the room.

I brace for the embarrassment from this indiscretion

And it doesn’t happen.

Comfort happens.

This night when she signs out she tells me that she kind of felt

That when we looked across the room and our eyes met

It felt special- like something was supposed to happen.

She asks me if I feel kind of like that.

I smirk at the astonishing discovery right under my nose

And answer the question.

No…I feel exactly like that.

John H. Bidwell