Sometimes a person is fortunate to find love and be loved. Love comes from with in and can be graciously given. There are so many answers to the question. I know that the warmth and feelings of love and sharing that special bond ,give one much needed sense of joy and contentment.....M
In the haunting melody "The Story" sung by Brandi Carlile are the words, "I was made for you."
Sounds magically simple, doesn't it? And yet in many published works and in the nationally church-sponsored program "Marriage Encounter," one learns that love is a decision. First comes attraction and infatuation followed, perhaps, by action. And it can last if you decide to make it last and if the person you decide to love (commit and dedicate yourself to) makes the same decision.
It's so romantic to say "I was made for you." But in a statement tantamount to marital heresay, I might admit that I've been attracted to dozens of women and have been slightly infatuated by at least a couple along the way. But I never made the decision to love them, that is, commit and dedicate myself to any of them.
And now the exception: When I was fourteen years old, I was attracted to a young woman also fourteen. The attraction led to infatuation, and that was followed by my decision to act. A few years later I married that young woman. I made the decision to marry her and to love her, as exemplified by my decision to dedicate myself to her and commit myself to our lives together. In a couple of months we will celebrate our 57th wedding anniversary and a lifetime of almost blissful relationship.
Oh, there have been several times when ending the relationship entered by mind. But when I acted to marry her, it was because I admired and respected who and what she was. I "picked her," so to speak. And I don't second guess my own judgment. She is still and always has been someone I admire and respect.
Finding "love" was rather easy. Keeping and having love, that is, maintaining the relationship, takes dedication and commitment. You decide to love someone and act on your decision. Save and except that person having a psychotic breakdown or other major relationship catastrophe, nothing has to change.
In my experience, one thing stands out: The longer it takes you to find that love of your life, the less chance you will have of succeeding in an enduring love. And the problem will probably be "you." You look for perfection, thinking that God is going to magically make the perfect person appear. Think again!
Does the perfect love relationship exist? I don't think so. We are human beings with individual likes and dislikes and individual personalities that for certain do not exactly match another's. Enduring love takes work. It takes commitment and dedication. You can do it or not do it. Love is a decision.
And I think it doesn't hurt keeping that decision a wise one when I leave a note for my beloved now and then saying something like, "My dear heart, let's run away together. Okay? But don't tell your husband. It'll be more exciting that way."
Have the answers? No. But I've found the answers that work for me.
I offer my admiration and respect to you, dear Gwendolyn, for asking such a profound question.
Nicely said. This one provokes thought! Hugs~
Sheila
Reviewed by ~ Holly Harbridge (Reader)
Reviewed on July 4, 2008
Hi Gwen, I believe only God has these answers my friend. To find love is difficult because we have to sift through all the b.s. If we are lucky enough to find it, to keep it we must be in love with ourselves. Love Holly
Great important thoughts here Gwend, my answer is when we love ourselves, the rest comes along! EASILY!
I'm glad to hear, you're always in a great place, where love is concerned!
Enriching heartfelt write my friend!
Write On!
Warmest Blessings and Inner Peace, Warrior Purple Passion Gypsy Lady Sheexoooo
Love can be very complicated.Just when we think we found someone special in our lives,they can change right in front of your eyes and realize that they weren't the one for us to begin with.Everybody deserves to be loved and everybody wants to be loved.Love can either be a happy feeling or a sad feeling where it breaks us up inside depending on close ones that have hurt us.Your poem speaks the truth.
God gives us the people he wants us to love, At least I see it that way. God is love and we are to love him as ourselves and love ourselves therefore. I cannot explain it any easier than that.
Paul has answered your question and I agree with his summation.
Reviewed by Paul Shakespeare (Reader)
Reviewed on June 30, 2008
Sometimes the "answers" we search for are right there in front of us all the time...
WHEN YOU INVITE THE LORD JESUS INTO YOUR HEART; "LOVE" IS IN YOUR HEART. You don't have to search for it. It is in you.
Because HE FIRST LOVED US; we don't have to search. People are "drawn" to you/us because they see the LOVE OF CHRIST "IN" US.
Filial Love won't do it. Eros Love falls short. Those (2) two types of love are either motivated by (kinship--as with "filial" love or motivated by lust or some perceived notion of an "ideal" mate as with "Eros" love. Only UNCONDITIONAL (AGAPE) LOVE will last and keep you in total bliss forever and ever. I learned this lesson a long time ago; and TRULY LOVE had FOUND ME ever since! <smile>
Sounds magically simple, doesn't it? And yet in many published works and in the nationally church-sponsored program "Marriage Encounter," one learns that love is a decision. First comes attraction and infatuation followed, perhaps, by action. And it can last if you decide to make it last and if the person you decide to love (commit and dedicate yourself to) makes the same decision.
It's so romantic to say "I was made for you." But in a statement tantamount to marital heresay, I might admit that I've been attracted to dozens of women and have been slightly infatuated by at least a couple along the way. But I never made the decision to love them, that is, commit and dedicate myself to any of them.
And now the exception: When I was fourteen years old, I was attracted to a young woman also fourteen. The attraction led to infatuation, and that was followed by my decision to act. A few years later I married that young woman. I made the decision to marry her and to love her, as exemplified by my decision to dedicate myself to her and commit myself to our lives together. In a couple of months we will celebrate our 57th wedding anniversary and a lifetime of almost blissful relationship.
Oh, there have been several times when ending the relationship entered by mind. But when I acted to marry her, it was because I admired and respected who and what she was. I "picked her," so to speak. And I don't second guess my own judgment. She is still and always has been someone I admire and respect.
Finding "love" was rather easy. Keeping and having love, that is, maintaining the relationship, takes dedication and commitment. You decide to love someone and act on your decision. Save and except that person having a psychotic breakdown or other major relationship catastrophe, nothing has to change.
In my experience, one thing stands out: The longer it takes you to find that love of your life, the less chance you will have of succeeding in an enduring love. And the problem will probably be "you." You look for perfection, thinking that God is going to magically make the perfect person appear. Think again!
Does the perfect love relationship exist? I don't think so. We are human beings with individual likes and dislikes and individual personalities that for certain do not exactly match another's. Enduring love takes work. It takes commitment and dedication. You can do it or not do it. Love is a decision.
And I think it doesn't hurt keeping that decision a wise one when I leave a note for my beloved now and then saying something like, "My dear heart, let's run away together. Okay? But don't tell your husband. It'll be more exciting that way."
Have the answers? No. But I've found the answers that work for me.
I offer my admiration and respect to you, dear Gwendolyn, for asking such a profound question.
Richard
Sheila
I'm glad to hear, you're always in a great place, where love is concerned!
Enriching heartfelt write my friend!
Write On!
Warmest Blessings and Inner Peace, Warrior Purple Passion Gypsy Lady Sheexoooo
STay Positive!
Be always safe,
Karen
Edwin
it would be indifferent.
hugs Fee
WHEN YOU INVITE THE LORD JESUS INTO YOUR HEART; "LOVE" IS IN YOUR HEART. You don't have to search for it. It is in you.
Because HE FIRST LOVED US; we don't have to search. People are "drawn" to you/us because they see the LOVE OF CHRIST "IN" US.
Filial Love won't do it. Eros Love falls short. Those (2) two types of love are either motivated by (kinship--as with "filial" love or motivated by lust or some perceived notion of an "ideal" mate as with "Eros" love. Only UNCONDITIONAL (AGAPE) LOVE will last and keep you in total bliss forever and ever. I learned this lesson a long time ago; and TRULY LOVE had FOUND ME ever since! <smile>
Take Special Care;
RW
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in Tx., Karen Lynn. :(