Customer Service (poem) by andrea coltman on AuthorsDen

Customer Service
by andrea coltman → (All Poetry by andrea coltman)
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Customer Service I dial a given number, they call customer service I feel like a complete novice When faced with 50 options, which one do I choose? Will I win or loose? An automated voice trills out and leaves me in a daze Confused; my mind in a quandary and haze Tentatively I pick a random number Another 50 options; was one about cucumber? What the hell; I press another button and pray That someone will talk to me today I’m through, I must be; music is playing “All our advisors are busy” a pre-recorded voice is saying Half an hour later, I’m dying for a pee All those cups of coffee are playing havoc with me Delusion has set in, a voice is asking for my name No more coffee for me, I don’t like this game Another question, more personal this time My date of birth I recall and mono-toned I chime My turn to ask for help, sweat pours down my brow I’ve forgotten, oh God what do I say now? Quickly I resume control and confidently enquire I say it quick in case I expire I’m waiting for the reply with baited breath Or is it my impending death? An hour has passed and I’m close to the final solution A conundrum of contradictions, I’m now plotting counterrevolution For customer service now tells me, and I’m sure, it’s a coup “Sorry I can’t help you” © Andrea Coltman

Reviewed by Dark Knight (Reader)

Reviewed on October 15, 2010

great poem-maybe sometime you should say you are a Doctor or even better a Lawyer or news reporter investigating the lack of help in Customer Service and see how fast they help you then--:-)

Reviewed by Connie Faust

Reviewed on March 13, 2008

Wow! You said it! What can make us as mad as the customer service runaround?

Connie

Reviewed by Phyllis Jean Green

Reviewed on June 16, 2006

What a wonderful job you have done!! As one who hates, loathes,
despises, and avoids to the point of 'spiting my face' the very thought of being run around the mulberry bush by commercial voice-mail, I salute you. Not only have you told the story well, you have aced rhyme and rhythm. . .made them serve rather
than intrude. In my book, that is nearly as hard as trying to
figure out what the f* is being said. . .and why the hell I
haven't hung up. . .& hung myself. Can't get to T h e m, so
. . .aaaaaaaaaaaaaaugh!!!!!! 'Pea' <3

Reviewed by Barbara Terry

Reviewed on May 10, 2006

Haven't we all been there before Andrea? It seems the more time goes on, the more automated everything becomes. Like I called my cable company yesterday and all I got were options about this or that, but not one option on what number to press to talk to a real person (giggle).

This is well written and very true too. Thanx for sharing Andrea.

May the Lord Jesus bless you, and those whom you love, and be with you always, and at your side constantly. With much love in my heart, joy to the world, peace on earth, & ((((((((((MANY WONDERFUL SISTERLY HUGGGGSSSS)))))))))), your little sister in poetry & prose, Barbie

"If I have to be this girl in me, Then I have the right to be."

Reviewed by Andre Bendavi ben-YEHU

Reviewed on September 8, 2005

This is creativity in poetic excellence...
"Customer Service" has given the readers all that
Poetry's tasks command.

Enjoyed reading this masterpiece.

Thank You for sharing Your art, and for enriching the poetic
history.

Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU

Reviewed by Felix Perry

Reviewed on September 6, 2005

Been there done that and wanted to strangle a lot of people in the process.

Felix

Reviewed by Tinka Boukes

Well expressed!!

Love Tinka

Reviewed by Dale Clark

I know this all too well. It's so
frustrating. You've captured that
here Andrea. Great! ;)

Reviewed by Sandie May Joyce (Sandie Angel)

What a misery that was! I hate those automated phone services which they call "customer servcies", it's a pain. Well-expressed in this piece.

Sandie May Angel a.k.a. Sandie Angel :o)

Reviewed by Andy Turner (Reader)

Totally true. I WANNA SHOOT THE INVENTER OF TALKING MACHINES. But it tells me to hang up and please try again. I found not pressing anything goes direct to a the remaining human.

Hope you is okay me girl. Long time no read.
You bin hanging on the fone that long. Huh...