You had folded it beautifully
into an origami dove,
but imposed over my
hard-sweated words
were red letters of your own:
an S was found under the tip of one wing;
an O (perhaps for olive) was held within
its tiny beak. As breast feathers parted,
two Rs could be seen nestled there.
And the Y was mine to seek and find.
I unfolded with care
the painstaking creases
lest any other contents be lost;
then the deadened parchment lay
a single ruffled sheet
spread-eagled on the table before me.
How bad news travels fast,
becoming an Ibis petrified
into bastion walls of the heart!
A graceful way of releasing the pain of rejection. The clarity of each line culminating in that one word: SORRY. Beautifully crafted. Thank you for sharing.
You write in such a splendid elegant way Kate, and so visual, this poem, went in so many directions, at least in my minds eye..........and the end was so stinging.......awww, I felt bad...
and thats good writing!!!! pax A
"hard-sweated words"
Oh my ... this image pierced me like a dagger KB. I so relate to the struggle one endures finding something worthwhile in such a cluttered creative environment.
"spread-eagled on the table before me."
Another superb image - yes, there is quite the vulnerability to the whole process when you open up and show the whole world, or just someone, your goods. Blessings and peace to you this season my talented friend.
Light and Wisdom ...
Richard
Rejection was first and foremost on my mind. Perhaps only in MY thought process. (lol) I love the way you wrapped this up into one folded little paper. I quote, "SORRY seems to be the hardest word." Peace Love and Blessings Always, Paul.
Kate, such a heart breaker in this one...I could feel the absolute pain & hurt in your heart. I've felt those pains too when my works have been rejected but do you want to know something...I'll continue to write as long as I have the strength because what I write is words I need to get out...so don't you dare tarry keep on plugging. Loved this overall write...it was written so beautifully.
Unique and poignant and as beautifully composed as the writers heart, this write shows and feels the pain of rejection but it also shows that the editor or publisher had some merit with the work to offer such an origianal apology...
Such divine imagination would never really be rejected, or no one would be accepted.;-) I love this one and it's now my favorite of yours! Bless you Kate you share your gift well!
Hah! I love it! My masterpiece essays were always littered with the Great American "AWK". I never, ever did get the hang of writing prose. If they thought it was awkward to read, they should have tried writing it from this fragmented perspective. I mean, if you can alliterate the Declaration of Independence, then who cares what it means... ...? ...? --Charlie
Brilliant! īspread-eagledī, fav bit, the whole is a top poem Kate - perfect. Nicky xx (Was wondering, the japanese origami storks, there is famous example of girl and storks in Hiroshima Peace park that made me weep walking through there one spooky morning, made in prayer, to get well + what one desires generally - and also for repentance i think(not sure), any way, might they manage to find their way into the poem if you ever go back to this one?)
Storks? *pfss* Cranes! sorry! (shouldnt drink and drive!)
For many untold background(insecure-ego-driven)reasons ... Such augmentations will be made to ease their path ~ Never allow that to alter yours...Evol( * )Ted
i feel that pain Kate, but alas we write and continue down that editorial morass with each stroke of our mind and heart put on paper. very original i must agree. be blessed my friend and pen away.
always,
randy
Reviewed by LadyJtalks LadyJzTalkZone (Reader)
Reviewed on December 11, 2007
at least it was a creative reply if it would not be the wanted one. Nicely done. Lady J
outstanding for fiction...vivid in details and emotion
Reviewed by Jerry Bolton (Reader)
Reviewed on December 11, 2007
Ain't dat the way it goes . . . Well, at least the SOB, OR DOB was a little artistic with the rebuff . . . Still, I'm quite sure the receiptant of the bad news would have liked to stick the "sorry" bird . . . Never mind, Tom'll be in my face if I don't cool it . . .
I would never return your poem; you are too good of a writer; your words deserve to be shared, read, enjoyed! And I enjoy your writings; you are one of my favorites here at the den!
Very well penned; brava!
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in America, Karen Lynn in Texas. :D
NOW AVAILABLE!
This book is a limited edition, and copies are hand numbered. It will NOT be available through Amazon or other distributors. You must purchase it directly from the author or from this site. It is hard-back (not the spiral bind seen
Be well,
Sheri
Newfie Hugs, Rose
You write in such a splendid elegant way Kate, and so visual, this poem, went in so many directions, at least in my minds eye..........and the end was so stinging.......awww, I felt bad...
and thats good writing!!!! pax A
BIG hugs to you!!
Love Tinka
Oh my ... this image pierced me like a dagger KB. I so relate to the struggle one endures finding something worthwhile in such a cluttered creative environment.
"spread-eagled on the table before me."
Another superb image - yes, there is quite the vulnerability to the whole process when you open up and show the whole world, or just someone, your goods. Blessings and peace to you this season my talented friend.
Light and Wisdom ...
Richard
Rejection was first and foremost on my mind. Perhaps only in MY thought process. (lol) I love the way you wrapped this up into one folded little paper. I quote, "SORRY seems to be the hardest word." Peace Love and Blessings Always, Paul.
Beauty persists without acceptance into the crass world of fast food, cheap thrills and sound bites. Write on Kate! Write on.
Keith
Be safe,
Karen
Such clarity, one can see this as it happens.
Good book title -Love Note-
Only thing: Two R's, te two Ronnies leapt to mind.
Always love your poetry, they enchant with their clever tales of life, oftentimes...
Outstanding write.
Christine
Fee
Love,
ET
Storks? *pfss* Cranes! sorry! (shouldnt drink and drive!)
always,
randy
*Glen*
And thanks for your wonderful note on my latest poem - it's a Keeper!
Very well penned; brava!
(((HUGS))) and much love, your friend in America, Karen Lynn in Texas. :D
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Regis