For Dan...my friend, my mentor, one of my earthly angels who felt the need to return to his heavenly home...much too soon.

 

 

This day, I feel ready,
finally. I want to kneel
beside your grave
and talk with you.

SCREAM AT YOU.

cry with you,
but not die with you.

In the morning sun,
where shadows cannot
intrude, nor steal truths
from the light of day,
yet, I want no answers,
I need no reasons,
I simply seek the smile
that was alive with you.

For one more moment,
I want to be cuddled,
cajoled, teased for my
insecurity and taunted
into courage once more.

I need to inhale the scent
of strength and carry it
forward, not remaining
buried with you.

And before I take my leave,
I must give back to you
the gift you offered to me --
A heart that hears the suffering,
reaches out and shares the pain,
makes the load a little lighter.

I need you to hear me, see me,
believe me as I whisper

apologies

for not listening
when your spirit was sinking,
your own strength fading,
desire to live waning,
soul dying within you.

This day, I realize,
finally, that you are gone.
Your handprint upon my heart
will echo --
reminder of the man,
the one who had faith
in this tragic drama queen,
faith I lost when you lost
you because I lost me, too.
A part of me dying with you.

So let us sit awhile
on this brisk March morn',
bask in the sunshine
of friendship shared,
friendship dared,
no longer mourned,
or crying for you
nor dying with you.

Simply loving you.

 

Until we meet again, my friend.