Da Wizzuda Woids (poem) by Kalikiano Kalei on AuthorsDen

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Da Wizzuda Woids

by Kalikiano Kalei — Read all 118 poems by Kalikiano Kalei

As a person who has long favored the sport of synchronised syntax swimming for most of my addled life, an interest in colloquial slang and 'pidgin' dialects just developed naturally. The following spontaneously came to life after a friend once asked me about one of my journalism mentors who used words as an obfuscative shield to hide behind, thus protecting his real (and only modestly talented) self from being revealed in all its pedestrian desultoriness. Whoda thunkit?! (PS: For some background on the real 'Wizzud', check out my blog entry titled 'Da Arda Gud Ritin').

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Da Wizuda Woids

Dere once wuzza Wizud

Who dabbled in woids,

He slottahed his nouns

An�e moidered his voibs.

His knowledge wuz small

Butiz bullshit wuz great

An�e moidered da language

All ovah da place!

Dis wizud blew smoke

Lik �is pans wuz afire,

An da lengt ovis phrases

Wuzza ting ta desire.

Dat is until wun day

Wen sumwun got bright

And figgered his game out,

Thus endin� is plight!

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Reviewed by Kathy Armijo

Reviewed on February 12, 2008

Dis wuz mos nlitng. Too full of one's self makes for a really, really small circle of friends.

God bless you. Kathy

Reviewed by Andre Bendavi ben-YEHU

Reviewed on February 10, 2008

Outstanding historic-social linguistic lesson... "Da Wizzuda Woids" shines.

In admiration,

Andre Emmanuel Bendavi ben-YEHU

Reviewed by Axilea MU

Reviewed on February 10, 2008

Apart from being very funny, your wizard makes me think of someone I met in another life. Oh how I ran for my (new)life! Narcissistic shields are very tricky and their bullshit (idealized self) can do anything to cover their underdeveloped, shame-ridden, true self.

Axilea

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