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Harry E Gilleland

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My Wife Watching “Wheel of Fortune”
by Harry E Gilleland → (All Poetry by Harry E Gilleland)
Friday, September 18, 2015    Rated "G" by the Author.
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A rhyming poem describing how my wife reacts to the popular TV game show.

Pat and Vanna get the show started.
Soon contestants are calling out letters,
successfully finding consonants assorted.
Bankrupts and misses their success fetters.

My wife soon announces what the puzzle
reads; for solving she has quite the knack.
Now her annoyance she cannot muzzle.
At the TV screen she begins to talk back.

Solution obvious, the contestant buys a vowel.
“No! No! You are just wasting your money!”
my wife pronounces in a rather loud howl.
Me: “You realize they can’t hear you, eh, honey?”

Even I now can see what the correct answer must be.
The clueless contestant guesses a wrong letter,
which sends my poor wife’s patience right up a tree.
She exclaims, “That fellow is dumber than an Irish setter.”

This pattern is repeated during round after round.
Shouts of “No!”, “You Dummy”, “Idiot!” fill the air,
as my wife’s growing frustration remains unbound.
A winner is crowned, saving my wife from total despair.

Finally that contestant goes to the Bonus Round.
Choices of letters made, the clock ticks down.
My wife gives the answer, once again me to astound.
As time runs out, my wife’s face wears a frown.

“How could they miss that? That was so lame,”
my wife exclaims. “Their not winning was a shame.”
Me: “On this show, you’d win great fortune and fame.”
Her: “On live TV I couldn’t even guess my own name!” 

Gilleland Poetry and Prose

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 Reviews of "My Wife Watching “Wheel of Fortune”"
Reviewed by Ronald Hull
Reviewed on September 19, 2015
I really like this little bit of humor. I'm sure your wife likes it, too. Especially that revelation in the last line.

Wheel of Fortune is my mother's all-time favorite show. She always scheduled our evening meal around it so that she could guess the answer to the phrases before any of the contestants even figured out what consonants to pick. It would've been my joy to see her on the show one day. But she never wanted to venture to the places where those shows aired.

Ron


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