How Can I Love Two?

by:  Linda Law

Is there room within the heart to love another

When the one you gave your mind and soul to

Has slipped away....Gone to another place

The one who knew your thoughts, your touch

Is no longer near;  When you know you feel as

if you cannot live again, yet something inside

stirs, again.  You don't want to feel again, for

that is saying the love you had was not forever

so you turn away, again and again....afraid..

knowing that the guilt will swallow you alive

That deep feeling that remains churning your

very breath from uttering the thoughts you

pretend are not there.  The need is strong

and I am not so brave, am not immortal,

my body aches,  skin needs to be touched

my heart is bursting to be held, to be loved

again....yet I run....I can't let go... cannot go

through a loss again, cannot watch another

wither and leave this earth again...the pain

is so immense, yet I am alive, don't want to be

yet I fool myself...pretend that I can't feel

that I can't love, that I don't want or need...

Then like the sun rising in the early morning

dawn, his eyes meet mine...his touch is

soft, kind and gentle on my lips.  I breathe

again, laugh once more, hope that tomorrow

will last forever once again....dare I hope

Dare I pretend, Dare I feel that it's alright

to love again.   Is it possible to store the old

most precious love within a safe place, within

my heart, within my soul.. a place where no one

can ever go... a place that is and always will

be forever yours and mine.  Will I be able to

give to another a new hope,  a promise that

I will give again, without comparison, without

reflection.  Will I be true or will I always think

of you,  step back in time, allow those memories

to unfold....Will I give once again, as I did with

you.... Will you understand. Will you know that

I must breathe again, feel again, be loved and

held again.  Will you know that you are always

tucked safely in my memories; and will you

release me of the guilt I bear, for without your

peace, I cannot share, I cannot give again.

This morning I realize that I can love again,

I have loved again....have not been worthy

as the guilt just cannot leave me to be free

so I ask of thee.... Can I love two.... or will it

always be just you?