One’s Tightrope Ponderance


One’s special space,
where chin resting upon knees tucked,
arms wrapped tight to be the ball we wish to be…

Is but…

One such moment,
where the harboring of our protected thoughts,
those times when happiness hangs tenuous
like a spider’s web trusting no harm will come
while trying to anchor tomorrow’s hope…

And yet…

We are all destined to be there at some time,
whether in one’s closet,
bedroom corner,
or storeroom darkness,
as child,
adult,
or senior.

We carry our tightrope ponderance
in a tenuous balance,
held tight in prayerful hands teetering,
often beneath squeezed eyelids,
holding blind elegance to fate.

Along the way,
this wavering stability,
the suspended animation of self
receives anxious news,
information,
results,
decisions,
hopes,
dreams,
fears,
all of eager need for answer.

As we ponder the next step…

Remembrance brings back painful times,
when trying too hard to maintain focus
might be pre-destining escape into the void.

Fortunately…

Some of us arrive at a different moment,
that time when perhaps we neither regret the past,
nor fear the future.

We unclasp our grip on equilibrium,
lift the head above our often-heavy burden,
spread our arms and breathe,
often for the first time and discover
that other special space…

Acceptance.

Accommodating discovery as precious
comes not without pain,
for assent to enlightenment
will always be fraught with rocky passage.

But…

The reaching of summit’s reward is without parallel,
forging forever that life exists as moments-in-waiting
of moments one allows to live
regardless the consequence.

To let go and fall is often the only way
to realize the gift of poise,
the knowing that living is about willing to risk,
to be more than what others may have said you were.

Ah,
the pause…

the breath…

the moment pondering the thin tightrope of existence eternal.

Nirvana.