Dreams Never Sleep
A father strives to finally getting it right,
succumbs to repeated nights of sweat drenched insomnia.
Somewhere,
he stumbles about
to clear the child’s room,
guitar,
video games,
posters.
Broad stairs to the garage,
once of stable hardwood,
now rickety rotted support
creaking of memories in flames
lead to once plush carpet soft with warmth,
now but cold cinders beneath his feet.
Sensory deprivation smiles,
Releases remembered glimpses of love
once bathed by generous moonlight
spilling from window
to banister
to door
to now barren concrete.
Here,
children’s eyes once visualized
what freedom’s flight would be like.
The father wanders outside,
stares blankly on the gray-white night
reflecting off algae encrusted pool,
now with but deflated basketball
adrift.
Through surrounding weeds and shrubs,
GI Joe action figures shimmer their loneliness as well,
staring like him at the pool’s granite carved beachhead,
imagination’s vast ocean of backyard fantasy now quiet,
make-believe war long before
reduced to the calm of real battles lost,
a city’s jungle rot now merged with other toxic fumes
saturating all.
No prisoners taken.
History.
The scuffling of his slippers
rake the humid night’s heaviness
like sandpaper dragging across
memory’s fine threaded tapestry.
Lying down among the overgrowth,
he peers through broken limbs,
crumbling leaves,
moon,
water,
house.
Eyes squeezed shut deliver regret’s creative gallery,
a lifetime installation perhaps never meant to be walked through,
yet…
Such are musings,
sometimes destined
to be but nightmares another time,
while the heart’s dreams remain forever awake.
The overriding cause for this condition is a disease called divorce. And then, of course there are many other maladies that could come along from natural disasters to accidents to financial irresponsibility or even drugs that can change a life from sweet to sour.
In my younger years, I lived in rooms and apartments plenty. Put everything in my car and drive away. But when I was in a new home that my wife wanted, and that she soon didn't and left, taking her furniture with her, I spent four years eating off a portable, foldable card table in the kitchen and sleeping on a mattress on the floor in an empty bleak environment every time I came home from work. Fortunately, I had furniture a thousand miles away that took a long time to retrieve.
Ron