All these years bound by fear,
mind under attack.
All these years the enemy has stolen from me,
I now want them back.

Years of malice,
self abuse, self defeated;
Feeling broken down,
self hate, emotionally beaten.

Years of tears
streaming down my heart;
Too low to get up,
could not set my self apart.

Apart from the enemy
that had me so bound.
Even though I knew where my release
and my strength could be found.

A daily fight, a struggle
within my own head.
Even though I knew where to go
to get my mind and spirit fed.

Part of me embraced
the place I was at.
It was familiar - being depressed, lonely,
self loathing, sometimes wanting to be just that.

God's tugging, pulling;
trying to bring me out.
To that longed for place of love
and peace I have no doubt.

But so broken, defeated and low am I,
I choose to stay;
Fighting God tooth and nail
every step of the way.

At the same time calling out
"Lord, Lord, please help me; please."
Now ready to surrender, so I drop to my knees.

Knees bent, face to the ground.
I start to confess to God
where I'm bound.

Tears flowing, loud sobbing.
"Lord speak to me. I'm tired of sitting idle."
Lift up my eyes, look to the left,
and there is my bible.

God speaks to me and says
"Everything you're searching for is found
right there in that book."
He goes on to say, "If you would just embrace me
like you used to and take a look."

I grabbed my bible and said,
"Lord, just lead me where you want me to go."
I let out a loud cry,
"Lord tell me what you want me to know."

He said, "My child, if you would just open up your mind and heart,
Listen to and spend some time with me,This bondage that you're in,
you shall surely be set free."

I randomly opened up my bible,
My face tear streaked.
The pages fell on Ephesians 6:10,
And the Lord began to speak.

Copyright 2008