Reflections Of Yesterday (poem) by Shirley A Parkerson on AuthorsDen

Reflections Of Yesterday
by Shirley A Parkerson → (All Poetry by Shirley A Parkerson)
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For anyone and everyone who has experienced domestic violence. This also is an attempt to enlighten those who have not experienced this horror.
Reflections Of Yesterday I remember the sting of yesterdays smack against my lower lip The salty taste of my own tears permeates the mouth that bleeds With a withering heart just barely alive... dieing from all the crime The empty soul screams for relief... yet those screams go unheard Biding my time until the next painful smack I sit cowering alone and quiet Making no sound, hardly breathing... not wanting to arouse his demon Not wanting to see him but watching through the corner of my eye I see him move, I tremble inside... my head drops lower to the floor I hear the footsteps getting closer to me, I hear the growl in his voice I know its going to happen again, I try desperately to get away His pace is much faster than mine, he catches me in no time at all With no will left, I look him in the eye and beg him to end it all now He regurgitates the same story again about how I ruined his life He regrets ever marrying me and the day that we both met He has wasted his time along with his life and how it should have been He wishes that I had never been born to torture his life here on earth He draws back his fist... it lands on my cheek... the blood flows down my neck I drop to the floor as he releases my throat from his strangling grasp I gasp for air and grab my cheek... I see all the hate in his eyes The next thing I remember is his boot coming for me I quickly move... it lands against my back... I hear the bones break in my head I try to crawl, but that angers him more his punches become wild and connect My head rolls back just as my eyes... I taste the tears again I awaken in a heap on the floor with him no where in sight I try to stand but my ribs are mush so I pull myself through the house With the little strength I have left I make my way out the door Thank God my neighbor saw me and offered what aid she could Then suddenly I awaken again, I was covered in a cold sweat I looked around the room several times for that demon from my past I opened the closets and looked under the bed to make sure he wasn't there I checked the doors to make sure they were locked and out the windows for his car I went and hid in my safe place until I felt safe alone I then realized it was only a dream, a reminder of my past Yet, it all seemed so vivid and real to me. I thought it was happening again Reflections of yesterday haunt me still even in my dreams I try to bury them deeper than before but they come back to me Shirley Ann Parkerson August 4, 2005

Reviewed by Angel God is Love

Reviewed on October 6, 2006

Wow that brings lots of memories to me. I left an abusive marriage over 12 years ago. My heart goes out to people who have lived that hell. I sure hope you did not have to expereince that kind of hell.
Hugs Angela

Reviewed by Shirley Atkins (Reader)

Reviewed on August 3, 2006

Shirley...Were you "sleep-walking" as do women who have since 'fled' domestic violence yet the fear seems to almost "remain" hidden behind a 'secret wall' to await the night hours when once again we are "stalked" in dreams from "subconscious" fear. We "do" move-on or "move-beyond" the violence but have you never noticed seemingly small experience remain the "triggers" of what "was" but is no longer?? I wrote poetry throughout the 1st year of new-found-freedom Shirley when it was easier than trying to verbaliize. your poetry emanates from a soul which still yearns serenity. God Bless You.

Reviewed by Phyllis Du'Gas (Reader)

Reviewed on December 31, 2005

Wow! That's all I can say is "Wow" I hope this also is just a writing. Blessings!

Reviewed by Leah Wilson

Reviewed on August 10, 2005

Shirley, domestic abuse is a horrible thing to endure. I hope this is just a writing and didnt happen to you. If it did, I am soo sorry, and I hope that your healing comes speedily; and I dont just mean physically, but mentally and emotionally. I also hope that if this is an account of your life, that you are now out of that situation. It only gets worse. My neighbors next door, a beautiful couple, seemed so in love. She soon became pregnant with their first child. I could hear her screams, and his profanities directed to her, along with the name calling. Happened repeatedly. She was now 7 months along, and came running out of their home; him chasing her, hitting her beating her, knocked her to the ground. She couldn't move. She continued to scream, I cried as I watched him (big burly guy) kick her with his boot right in her huge stomach. Then...of all humilations, he unzipped his pants and urinated on her. In her face, as she sobbed. Yes, I called the police, who did not get there in time. The ambulance came. I saw her about a week later. (no longer pregnant) she got her clothes and left with a police escort. So sad. I wonder...HOW?....can love turn to that? What possesses a man to do that to his wife, the mother of his unborn child? Thanks for writing this. I hope that anyone in that kind of situation will call a shelter for abused women. They can help you and your children get a fresh new start in life. Love, Leah