Why Tooth Fairies Are Necessary in NASCAR Racing

underrated though they may be,
quite invisible at times,
not seen often in gardens
or under beds or even
on race tracks,
tooth fairies seem
destined for a comeback
(or a return as in Sunset
Boulevard).

such a return might be
ignored, but teeth continue
to fall out, especially
in the younger, pre-school set,
where baby teeth are just
so much dainty flotsam,
jettisoned frequently.

but with pennies being ignored
and the dollar losing value,
tooth fairies need big
bucks to stay in business, and
NASCAR can provide the perfect venue, teeth busted out by competing
teams' fisticuffs,
pit stops evoking scenes of adult
teeth strewn on pavement, and
most of all NASCAR bigger bucks
to support these modern-day fairies,
now accustomed to helmets
and protective gear.

But where to place
the funds, since pillows
remain absent on asphalt, and
fairies need secret places
to collect?

We have just the solution:
fairie fanny packs! as they fly by,
grabbing teeth here and there,
they might pause in air, flitting
little wings as burly guys pull
out cash and dump it into
fanny packs.

not demure nor stylish, perhaps,
yet appropriate for NASCAR
where speed and dash pay-off,
and old fairie legends can
compete with the likes
of Earnhart Jr.